Nothing is more crushing to believing parents than to see their children turn their backs on their Christian heritage and dive into the gaping jaws of the world—but it happens. Not only does it happen, but it happens to faithful, loving, Bible-believing, Christ-honoring parents. So, what will you do if some of your children prove to be Jacobs and others prove to be Esaus? We will look to Christ and His Word for answers.

Good morning please open your Bibles to Romans chapter 9 Paul's epistle to the Romans chapter 9 and please stand with me we're going to read 13 verses I bring you greetings from Mount Zion Bible Church in Pensacola Florida it is a great delight to be back with you again it's always a blessing to be here and I'm especially delighted that my fellow elder could be here as well brother Clarence Simmons. Romans chapter 9 beginning in verse 1 let us give our hearts attention to the Word of God. I say the truth in Christ, I lie not. My conscience also bearing me witness in the Holy Ghost that I have great heaviness and continual sorrow in my heart for I could wish that myself were accursed from Christ for my brethren my kinsmen according to the flesh who are Israelites to whom pertaineth the adoption and the glory and the covenants and the giving of the law and the service of God and the promises, whose are the fathers and of whom as concerning the flesh Christ came who is over all God blessed forever. Amen.

Not as though the word of God had taken none effect, for they are not all Israel, which are of Israel, neither because they are the seed of Abraham are they all children but in Isaac shall thy seed be called that is they which are the children of the flesh these are not the children of God but the children of the promise accounted for the seed well this is the word of promise at this time will I come and Sarah shall have a son and not only this but when Rebecca also had conceived by one, even by our father Isaac, for the children being not yet born, either having done any good or evil, that the purpose of God according to election might stand not of works but of him that calleth it was said unto her the elder shall serve the younger as it is written Jacob have I loved but Esau have I hated. Amen. May the Lord add his blessing to the reading of his word. Let's unite our hearts in prayer. Almighty God, we come before thee this morning fully aware that without thee we can do nothing.

We acknowledge that thou art Almighty God, the sovereign creator of heaven and earth our Lord and our Redeemer Oh come Gracious head of the church come Lord Jesus pour out thy spirit here upon us today We are in desperate need of thy power. We are in desperate need of thy presence. We do not need a lecture, we do not simply need a commentary. Oh God we need to hear from thee. We need the power of thy word to burn in our souls, the power of the world to come to open our hearts and help us to understand thy eternal truth.

We pray that thou would save the lost and sanctify the saved. May it all be to the glory of Christ in whose name we pray amen please be seated the relation of God's sovereignty the gospel of Jesus Christ and the salvation of sinners are hotly debated among God's professing people. The ninth chapter of Paul's epistle to the Romans is one of the battlegrounds on which those debates rage. And among conscientious, theologically-minded readers of Paul's letter, perhaps few controversies surpass verse 13. Jacob have I loved but Esau have I hated.

The human instrument is Paul but the voice is God. Almighty God. Now that text identifies two children in Rebecca's covenant womb, Jacob and Esau. They shared the same covenant space, but not the same covenant grace. Jacob was the child of God's promise.

Through him, God would make a covenant people who would give birth to the savior of the world. Jacob was chosen. Esau was rejected. Both were in the same womb. That raises a disturbing question.

And every thoughtful parent must ponder it. What are you going to do if God puts Esau in your house? Is there an experience in this world that crushes a godly parent's heart more, that causes more gut-wrenching anguish than children who turn their backs on their Christian upbringing and run into the arms of the world. I can think of none. Yet it is the experience of many godly parents.

I do not expect everyone here to agree with all the views and conclusions that follow, But my wife, to whom I dedicate this message, my wife, Myra, and I have experienced Esau in our house. I'm not preaching theoretically this morning. I'm not preaching speculatively. I'm not wondering. So I have prayed that our Savior will grant at least some encouragement and hope to broken-hearted parents and I've also prayed that I might prepare some in the event that God puts Esau in your house.

So may our loving Heavenly Father through Christ our mediator illumine our hearts to his word by his Holy spirit. First let us consider a brief exposition of this complex and controversial passage. In verses 1 through 5 Paul declares his great anguish for his Jewish brethren. Why? They were unbelievers.

They had rejected their Messiah and they sought the righteousness of God by works not by faith. So in this passage Paul addresses a question. Did God's Old Testament promises to Israel fail? Paul's answer is no, but how does he explain that? He says, not as though the word of God hath taken an effect.

In other words, God's promises to Israel have not failed, though to many it would appear that they have. Rather, they have taken effect in God's elect. To prove that, Paul makes this argument. They are not all Israel, which are of Israel, neither because they are the seed of Abraham are they all children. But in Isaac shall thy seed be called.

They which are the children of the flesh these are not the children of God but the children of the promise are counted for the seed. Now that means one can be a physical descendant of Abraham without being a true child of God. God chose Abraham's son Isaac, not his son Ishmael. God saved Isaac and would create his covenant people through him. By promise, Paul meant God's promise in Genesis chapter 10 verse 14.

At this time will I come and Sarah shall have a son that is God kept his promise through the miraculous birth of Isaac not through the natural birth of Ishmael. Paul then strengthens his argument by giving another example. Not only this, but when Rebekah also had conceived by one, even by our father Isaac, at that point Paul stops to add an explanatory thought about the children in Rebecca's womb. For the children being not yet born, neither having done any good or evil that the purpose of God according to election might stand not of works but of him that calleth So God did not choose Jacob or reject Esau on the basis of their works. He chose Jacob and rejected Esau according to his purpose of election.

With that in mind Paul completes his thought. The elder Esau shall serve the younger Jacob. Why did God do this? Paul answers from Malachi chapter 1 verse 3. Jacob have I loved but Esau have I hated.

God loved Jacob, saved him and created the nation of Israel from his sons. But God hated Esau, made of him a nation, the nation of Edom, and left him to his profane godless character. Ishmael, Isaac, Jacob, Esau were all Abraham's descendants. So what made the difference between them? The purpose of God according to election.

Now our sermon arises from that thought. In godly families, God saves some children and leaves others to their wicked hearts. That's not every case but it is the reality says the Word of God. Well then can godly parents know with certainty that any one of their children is Esau? Of their children is Esau.

No. Only God knows from eternity who his Jacobs and Esau's are. We do not. But we can know that a child is ungodly and all ungodly children are potential Esau's. However, ungodly children may be prodigals who someday return.

We must pray for an ungodly child as though he were a prodigal with the hope that God in his mercy will reclaim him. And by the way, when I say he and him, that applies to she and her. Whenever you hear me, young ladies and older women, when you hear me say he and here, it applies to you as well. Our ungodly child will only prove to be an Esau when he dies without Christ. Now what do we mean by godly parents?

We're not talking about people who just go to a building called a church once in a while, or even regularly. Godly parents have been born of God's spirit. They are alive according to the power of Almighty God. Because of that they believe that the Bible is the only sufficient, certain and infallible rule of all faith and practice. They bow to the lordship of Christ in every aspect of life.

So they care for the physical and spiritual needs of their children bringing them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord godly parents are flawed at best That right? Have any perfect parents here? Don't lie. There are none, but there are godly parents there are godly parents flawed at best often failing in their law they're very lofty parental desires but they repent of their sins they believe on Christ and they flourish in the gospel love of their savior. They're real people with a real savior.

So if we don't So if we don't know with certainty that a child is Esau, how do godly parents know and what do we mean by Esau in your house? Hebrews chapter 12 verse 16 tells us that Esau was a profane person. Profane means godless, having no respect for heavenly things. A profane person cares nothing for the promises or warnings of God's word. He thinks little or nothing of being brought up in a godly family.

So when I say Esau in your house, I mean God has given you an ungodly child who turns his back on what is holy, casts off the privileges of his godly upbringing and pursues worldly and ungodly things like Esau. What then should godly parents do when Esau shows his colors? And I know some of you have had, some of you may be having this experience. It is a dreaded one. When parents begin to understand, when they begin to see that disinterest, that sullen look, that disinterest in holy things, right things, good things.

And you see that attraction to the voice of the world. What do you do? When Esau shows his colors, the first thing you must do is thank and praise God for sending that Providence unto you. What did Job do when in the same day He lost all his oxen, donkeys, sheep, camels, the attending servants and all ten of his children. He fell upon the ground and worshipped.

And worshipped. He said, the Lord gave and the Lord hath taken away blessed be the name of the Lord and Paul urges and everything give thanks for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you that will be difficult. It may be with great trembling and tears, groanings, but love for, trust in, and submission to the sovereign God who loved you before the foundation of the world and gave his son for you is the path of rest for your troubled soul. Nothing else comes close. You have done what you could for your ungodly child.

Trust God. Trust the God who gave that child to you. Number two, you must realize that your good works cannot save your Esau or any of your children. I have to repeat this because many in the work of family reform believe that if they follow the formula, get in with the people who do all the right stuff with their children, your children are going to turn out all right. The very text that we're reading puts the lie to that false theology.

And it is false theology. Godly parents can create a beautiful Christ-filled home life. You can be consistent with family worship, you can create a loving environment in which children flourish, you can teach them to pray, to read Holy Scripture, to understand the difference between the law and gospel, You can brand what is right and wrong in their consciences for as long as they live and you must. But you cannot save them. Your works will not save them any more than their works will save them.

Generally you will see when your children are younger they can repeat their catechisms and confessions, the scriptures they have memorized, and portions of sermons they have heard. Oh, that's so sweet to a parent's ears. They can have favorite preachers that they like to hear. They can heartily sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs on the Lord's day with all the saints. But your best works, oh godly parents, cannot and will not save them.

Your work before God is by the grace and faith of the Lord Jesus, by looking unto the Lord Jesus, is to bring them up to be proper and fit vessels for the Holy Spirit, but you cannot regenerate them. That belongs to God alone. Isaac and Rebekah's godly home could not give Esau a taste for holy things. God puts Esau's in the home of some godly families and he saves some wretches out of godless homes There is no formula so stop looking for it. Obey what the Word of God tells you and leave it in his hands.

There's where you can rest. Number three, you must ask the Lord to reveal if you have committed sins that contributed to the defection of your ungodly child. There are no perfect parents, But as I said before, there are godly parents. But even godly parents can do, or can and do, sin against their children. Impatience, unrealistic expectations, abuse of authority, unnecessary harshness, broken promises, public humiliation, name-calling, derogatory remarks, inconsistency, yes Name calling, derogatory remarks, inconsistency, yes that's a sin, or excessive punishment.

If you are guilty of those or similar sins, you must repent before God and before your Esau. The reasons for that are, number one, to remove any barrier to reconciliation. And number two, to know before God that you have done what you could to bring reconciliation. They will answer to God for what they do and how they respond to you, but you should give them every opportunity to reconcile. Your sincere repentance will not save him.

Nevertheless, you do not want to contribute to his damnation. If God sentences your Esau to everlasting burnings, May your testimony be that you did all you could to point him to Christ the Savior and to deliver him from eternal misery. Number four, repent if you discover that you have been an idolater. Godly parents can be guilty of making idols of their children. Unwittingly you may begin to find all your happiness in your children instead of in the God who gave you the children.

Your darling sons on earth can subtly take the place of the darling Son of God in heaven. We can idolize our children in numerous ways, but thou shalt have no other gods before me, includes our little ones. Confess your idolatry if you discover it, for God is faithful and just to forgive your sins and to cleanse you from all unrighteousness. Number five, you must be earnest, consistent as God gives you grace and mighty in prayer. If Esau's in your house, You should be before the throne of grace, often intensely, ardently.

Paul urges believers to pray always with all prayer and supplication in the spirit. Oh broken-hearted parents, you wrestle not with flesh and blood but against principalities, against powers, against the rules of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places And take heart Knowing that the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds. You are in a war and you, like David, need to do all that you can by the grace and mercy of God to take your lamb out of the lion's mouth. While you may find some comfort in sharing your miseries with brothers and sisters who have experienced the same loss, and certainly that's a real thing, Your greatest solace is communion with Christ. Communion with Christ.

Hear my cry, O God, attend unto my prayer. From the ends of the earth will I cry unto thee. When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I. There is comfort when your Esau is still breathing. Nothing will bring balm to your soul like leaning on Christ's bosom.

Number six. In your sorrow and grief, which are real and profound, You must remember that you are not alone. First, Jesus Christ, the lover of your soul, the Word of God made flesh, the blessed one who loved you and gave himself for you will never leave thee nor forsake thee. You are never alone. Do not listen to the lies of your flesh or the devil.

You, as Christ's people, have been loved before the foundation of the world, and he will never leave you, especially as you walk through that dark valley. Pour out your grieving heart to him and hear him. Fear thou not, for I am with thee, be not dismayed, for I am thy God. I will strengthen thee. Yea, I will help thee.

I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness. And now pass us through the waters. I will be with thee. There is your comfort. There is your comfort.

There is your relief. And it is real. Furthermore, remember that Adam and Eve, the first recipients of God's promise of Christ, gave birth to Cain, a murderer of his own brother. Noah, the preacher of righteousness, was father to wicked Ham. Godly Isaac and Rebekah had that godless Esau And David was father to traitorous Absalom who led a rebellion against his own loving father.

You are not alone in history or from the very presence of God in heaven. Number seven, in your sorrow and grief, do not dishonor God. Do not dishonor God. Your anguish is natural. It's expected and it's reasonable, but you can sorrow sinfully.

David cried, oh my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom, what God I had died for thee. But David turned victory into mourning. He shamed all those who had risked their lives to save him and agonized over an unrepentant, bloodthirsty traitor who defiled his father's concubines, turned the nation against him, stole his kingdom, and was trying to take his father's life. Oh groaning parents, Christ loves you while your Esau despises you. Christ counts your tears while Esau causes your tears.

Christ heals your heart while Esau rips up your heart. Rather by God's grace and spirit you should grieve and groan more that your Esau has rebelled against a holy God. He's in trouble with God. He will not win that war. He has despised the gracious God, sneered at a providing God, and rejected a saving God.

Your tendency will be to grieve your loss, your hurt feelings, and your dashed hopes more than to grieve Esau's hatred for God. Your groaning is real. It's legitimate, but it can become sinful. You should be more grieved that he has dishonored your God, that he's defiling his own soul, and He is inviting God's most severe and eternal wrath. Grieve with faith in God's promises.

Number eight, realize your blessings in Christ. Do not let your sorrow overshadow God's treasures to you every day in Christ. Whatever or whomever you lose in this world, You have all if you have Christ. You have all if you have Christ. Esau loves himself and will do so to the grave unless he turns to Christ.

But God's eternal love for you will never diminish. God the Father loved you before the foundation of the world. He sent his son to become a man so that he could be your prophet, your priest, your king. He sent his son to be the sin-bearing substitute in your place. He kept God's law for you, died on Calvary's cross for you, rose again from the dead for your justification, ascended into glory to intercede for you, and he's interceding for you at this moment and he will one day bring you into his presence so that you may forever see him in his glory.

Your Esau can your glory, your Esau can never compare to that. Great as your sorrow is, you have Christ. Esau destroys your happiness and casts his self-worshipping shadow over your joy. But Jesus will wipe away all your tears, swallow up death and victory, and fill you with eternal joy. And even in those darkest days while you were dealing with your Esau, he can give you joy unspeakable and full of glory.

And I know it. Elkanah said to grieving Hannah, why is thy heart grieved? Am I not better to thee than millions of children, millions of worlds, millions of galaxies and all of their wealth? Your sorrow for Esau will pass eventually. Your treasures and joys in Christ are for all eternity.

Though Esau leaves you, Jesus never will. Never. Now what you two Christians do when they learn Esau is in a Godly family's home. One, they should pray for the suffering family in and out of their presence. Go to their home and pray for them.

Few things open the fountain of parents' eyes as Esau in their house. Pray for their sorrow, their agonies, their fears as they groan out their rivers of tears. Bear you one another's burdens and so other's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ. When our Esau left home, no one came No one called us. Our pastor did not darken our door.

If you have knowledge of someone's suffering, pray for them in your home and go to their house and pray with them there. Bless them by bearing their burdens with them. They feel like they're dying. They feel like they may never smile again. They see their life investment thrown away.

They fear that that child that they taught and taught of Christ will be consumed forever in the flames of hell. Go pray with them. Number two, let them know that you love them in Christ. When a child proves ungodly, a unique and indescribable pain cuts to the core of every father and mother. They will say things like, my ungodly child is a greater calamity than not having children.

Having Esau in my house is worse than having a child that suffers with disease or deformity. I would rather lose a child, a believing child to death, than to lose an ungodly child to the world and hell. I've heard these, I've said some of them. Show them your love and weep with them that weep. And finally, do not be quick, do not be quick to condemn such parents for faulty parenting.

In gatherings such as this, there are always those who conclude that when a child abandons his home, the parents did not have enough faith or they did something wrong. Such are no better than Job's comforters, no better than the name-it-and-claim-it crowd who pronounce the sick or poor as having little faith or no faith. Be careful. God may put Esau in your house. Lastly, I will address the ungodly children in this gathering.

I'm speaking now to those who are ungodly. What do I mean by that? Well, I mean you have no interest in the things of Christ. You have no interest over your immortal soul. You are not concerned that you may open your eyes in hell tomorrow.

You hear the sweet sound of the gospel and yet it means nothing to you. You're ungodly. So I ask you, are you ungodly? Are you Esau? You don't have to be outwardly rebellious to be so, young people.

Do you have little or no care that you have an immortal soul and that you can lose it for all eternity. No interest in the promises of Christ, a childlike faith that looks to him, and eternal life that doesn't move you? If you have not looked to Christ, please hear me. I do not say this as your judge. I merely stand here to warn you.

Number one, you are profane like Esau because you care not for holy things. Through your parents, almighty God has provided food and clothing for your body, education for your mind, happiness for your senses, friendship and love for your heart, correction for your errors, praises for your accomplishments and the hope of salvation by presenting Jesus Christ to your soul. Jesus said however that Capernaum would be brought down to hell because his ministry in that place was glorious it was extraordinary and he said it shall be more tolerable for the land of Sodom in the day of judgment than for thee and I say to you Esau's I say to the ungodly you will have a lower place in hell than all depraved, idolatrous, whorish, murderous sinners that never heard the name of Christ. Come to Christ. Come unto me, he said, all ye that labor in her heavy laden and I will give you rest.

Number two, you are profane like Esau because you despise your godly father and mother and have brought unimaginable sorrows upon them or you're plotting to do so. Oh, when I get 18, I'm out of this place. I'm going to do what I want. I'm going to live like I want. Solomon said, the father of a fool hath no joy and bitterness to her that bear him.

In your self-worship you have trampled a godly heritage, ignored your parents spirit wrought goodness, despised their gracious provisions, dashed their hopes for you, ruined their joy, displayed a devilish arrogance and worst of all you have rejected their presentations of Christ the Savior to you In that you have broken the fifth commandment Heaps sorrows upon them and have invited your own eternal damnation. Oh please consider yourself flee to Christ he is a willing Savior flee to Christ here the the glorious gospel promises that your parents have set before you consider your immortal soul thirdly you are profane like Esau because you love the world instead of Christ, the holy son of God. You are a fool. To swap your immortal soul for worldly pleasures. That has everlasting consequences.

Oh, please. Repent of your sins. Come to Christ. Believe on him and to everlasting life. And finally, you are profane.

You are profane like Esau because you reject the person and the work of Jesus Christ. In the history of the world, my friends, Millions have never heard the precious name of Jesus. They've never heard the gospel call. They've never had space to repent and to believe on the crucified and resurrected savior, you have. But you have turned your back on the eternal purpose of God revealed to you in Christ, ignored his saving work for sinners, which is perfect, complete, despised his death upon the cross and the precious blood that washes away all sin.

You've made light of his glorious resurrection. You've rejected everlasting joys to embrace everlasting damnation, petition, the horror of lying down in the flames of hell for eternity. You deserve no grace. You deserve no mercy. You deserve no love.

And there will be none in hell. You're still breathing. Come to Christ. For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten Son that whosoever believeth in him should not perish but have everlasting life parents as God put Esau in your heart, in your house, I pray that your Esau will prove to be a prodigal. I pray that all the potential Esau's will repent in their pig pen and come home and come to Christ.

But I also say to you, if he proves to be an Esau, I have given you a few biblical comforts among many for your groaning soul. You will agree with God with his wisdom in the day of judgment. May your rest be ever in Christ and be grateful to God for those of your children who look by faith to him amen Father seal these truths to our souls in the name of Jesus amen