What is the aroma of your home? Not literally, we aren't asking if your home smells of bacon or cookies (Though both are good too!), but what is the spiritual aroma that fills your home? Is it a pleasing aroma, rising like incense before the Lord? The commands of God for home and family life give us the pattern for creating a home filled with the pleasant aroma of love that pleases God. Ultimately this is the work of the Spirit in the lives of those who have submitted themselves to Jesus Christ and believed his Gospel.

God gives many wonderful rules for families, it's so good. However, family life, really the way the Bible designs it, is a work of the Spirit. It's a work of the Holy Spirit. The very best manifestations of the glory of God, the only true manifestations of the glory of God are works of the Holy Spirit. And that's why when we began our whole discussion at the very beginning of this conference, I spoke of the fact that the family life passages of Scripture, they really all assume the filling of the Holy Spirit.

They all assume genuine love of God from the heart. That's what you find in the early worshiping families. In Adam's family, Abel was worshiping God with his whole heart with genuine sacrifice that arose out of the power of the Spirit of God working in his family with Abraham and his family he was justified by faith alone and he therefore was justified and he commands his children to do justice and righteousness And you go to David and you find the very same thing, particularly in the Psalms, that these are manifestations of the beauty of God that really arises out of works of the Spirit of God. When you get to the end of the Old Testament, the last prophet of the Old Testament, you find out the family life is profoundly affected by the gospel and that it's a god. He turns the hearts of a father to his children and God by the power the Holy Spirit turns the heart of a child to his parent and all this has to do with the power the Holy Spirit.

When you get to the New Testament you find the same thing there's really no change, There's just accelerated manifestations of the glory of God in the New Covenant. Greater capabilities, greater promises, and that's why the Apostle Paul, when he begins his discussion on the family life codes, he begins with the power of the Holy Spirit. Do not be drunk with wine, but be filled with the Holy Spirit. And then husbands are going to love their wives like Christ loved the church. And then wives are going to submit to their husbands out of the voluntary power of the Holy Spirit in their life and then children are going to obey their parents and fathers are not going to exasperate their children because family life really was meant to be a manifestation of the Holy Spirit And while there are marvelous laws and rules that we should all follow, we can't be confused at what these laws are all about.

They're all laws of love that come from the Spirit of God. The fruit of the Spirit is love. There you have it. So family life is a work of the spirit and that's very important that we understand. You know the apostle Paul talked about this in terms of fragrance, the aroma.

I wanna talk about the aroma of your home. The aroma of your home. Paul said, for we are to God the fragrance of Christ among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing. He said, the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. These are all manifestations of the Holy Spirit.

Aromas in the home are gifts of God. Aromas are actually, they're wonderful. Aromas trigger memories and they activate emotions. I love going into the coffee shop, you know, because of the aromas there. You know, I'm kind of drawn there.

Every mother knows the pleasant sensation of the smell of a newborn. Anybody who's held a newborn baby, it activates something in you, doesn't it? You're drawn by the aroma, and it actually induces love. Aromas were moved by the smell of crayons and coffee and bubblegum and leather and lavender and don't you love fresh cut grass and, you know, the cooking of bacon. These things activate emotions and they draw us in you know your home gives off an aroma when people walk into your home it has an aroma it has a particular feel and an atmosphere, you know.

When I come home from work, I love what my wife does. She always has the house just smelling so great, like welcome home. Even if there's not something, you know, cooking at that moment, you know, she'll often fake it and have something cookie something actually not cooking you know but we're giving off an aroma and I'm so glad She pays attention to the aroma of our home. But there's a different aroma of the home that cooking can't mask. And it's the aroma of love.

It's the aroma of the Holy Spirit. And Paul tells us that the Christian, filled with the Holy Spirit, gives an aroma of death to those who are perishing and the aroma of life to those who are being saved. We are a fragrance. Parents need to recognize that they are a fragrance. And Paul's language when he used this language about fragrance, he's he's he's hearkening back to the temple worship of the Old Testament where sacrifices were made and incense was causing a pleasing aroma up to God.

I pray our families are like that. They're like a pleasing aroma to God and to all those who are being saved as well. And these are manifestations of the Holy Spirit. These aren't things that you just put on. They come up out of the heart.

And that's why the Apostle told the Corinthian church, he said, not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think of anything is coming from ourselves but our sufficiency is from God who also made us sufficient as ministers of the New Covenant not of the letter but of the Spirit for the letter kills but the Spirit gives life And you know Paul said that the aroma of the Spirit when it's released he said where the Spirit of the Lord is there's liberty but we all with unveiled face beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory just as by the Spirit of our Lord. Family life really is designed to be an aroma that arises out of the Spirit of God. And the commands of God for our families, and there are many commands that we should obey. We should seek to obey all of them with all of our hearts we should seek to be obedient sons and daughters it's right to be obedient and to have a heart of obedience. John says that if you don't have a heart to obey you're not a Christian.

So a heart of obedience is very, very important. But the description of the operation of the Holy Spirit in the home is also contained in various commands. The family life codes in Ephesians that begin with be filled with the Holy Spirit actually follow rules to follow things that you're supposed to do as parents and children. But these things aren't wooden, they're spiritual, they have life in them. And the filling of the Holy Spirit is the interpretive assumption of all the commands to fathers and children and wives and husbands and those who are involved in the household economy as servants.

In other words Paul issues the commands but he's assuming that they're activated and they're energized by the Holy Spirit And what Paul is arguing in the family life codes in Ephesians is that the filling of the Spirit is the very most important matter in your church and in your family. And he makes it clear that the doctrine of the Holy Spirit, it's not a cold doctrine, it enlivens everything, but he also tells us what to do in this code. And so If you read the family life codes in Ephesians 5 and 6, you notice that the commands tell children and parents what to do. They must honor and obey. And parents must bring their children up in the training and the admonition of the Lord and keep from discouraging their children.

These are duties and commands. But Paul has more than duty in mind. He has duty in mind, which is pivotal. But he speaks of the way the commands are to be carried out and the ministry of the Holy Spirit tells you the spirit with which you carry out the commands in other words the commands to children and parents must be obeyed but there is a way in which these commands are meant to be obeyed so they're the commands and then there is the way of implementing those commands and following those commands and so Paul is explaining the moral code and right alongside it embedded with it inextricably connected to it is the spiritual mode of it. There's a moral code and a spiritual mode in his instructions and Paul is explaining both of them and Christians are always in danger in disconnecting the commands of God, what to do from the way of God how his commands are to be carried out.

The Bible doesn't just give you a spiritual mode it also gives you a moral code and you cannot disconnect both of them The Apostle John makes this very clear in 1 John. You cannot disconnect the two. So what about rules? Make sure that your family is not driven by rules alone. I think that was manifestly communicated just a few minutes ago.

Rules are good. God gives commands. This is why Ephesians 6 1 through 4 explains what children and parents should do. Those are the rules. But the context of the text reveals how these things are done in a family.

How? By the power of the person and the work of the Holy Spirit. That's how. Family life is not mechanical. It's spiritual.

It's life. And family life is designed to spring from the Spirit and life and grace energized by the power of the resurrection. And so family life the way God designed it is a work of the Holy Spirit. It is a family life that is an expression of the work of the Holy Spirit by the power of the gospel. Now maybe you know nice families and their children grew up with a moral code.

It was a good moral code. It was God's moral code. And the parents wanted to have a good Christian family. And they are well ordered families. And the children are taught to work hard and respect authority say please and thank you.

They're taught to be obedient and polite and not to crawl all over the furniture and their parents rightly taught them to respect other people and shake their hands and look them in the eye. That was right for them to do. They need to be taught to be gracious human beings in the world. And they were taught to be good citizens. They had a moral code.

But it's possible to have a moral code without spiritual life. To have all the rules, but not the hope of the gospel. And it's important that we understand what is the heart of the family. And the heart of the family is the Spirit of God and if you don't have the Spirit of God then you'll you'll just be you have to be fine with your rules but you'll have to know where that will get you probably to everlasting punishment with such nice rule keeping. You know when Monty was describing this beautiful life that Donald Gray Barnhouse was referring to.

I was thinking, this is Mormonism. Ever been to Salt Lake City? I thought he was describing Salt Lake City. Without Jesus Christ though. A moral code without him.

So there's a moral code in spiritual mode. And so that means that Family life is meant to be lived out of the intimate connection with the Lord Jesus Christ. And the progressive transforming power of the Holy Spirit. That's really the key to a happy family. The key to a happy family is beholding the face of Jesus Christ and being transformed into his likeness.

And this is the kind of family where the parents are putting to death the deeds of the flesh and they're looking unto Jesus the author and the perfecter of their faith and they understand that the rules are only meaningful by the power the Holy Spirit. So there's this matter of aroma it's an aroma of love when you're filled with the Spirit your heart is operating out of love, and as a result, you raise your children in the context of the aroma of love, using the commands of love, the law of God, and the spirit of love, which energizes all the commands. And so the filling of the Holy Spirit is actually it's very tangible. It has sight and sound. It has smell.

And you can see the manifestations. There's an aroma of love. It's love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. And this is how Paul explains how family lives work by the power of the Holy Spirit. And that means that when you discipline you discipline out of a heart of love and when you do your work as a parent you do it with joy And your heart is at peace while you're making peace.

And you speak and act out of patience and you correct your children with kindness. You draw your children into a world of goodness. And you're consistent with your rules out of a heart of faithfulness. And you offer your counsel in a spirit of gentleness and you administer the rod with self-control. But there are things that you should do and you must do them but there is a way that you ought to do them and that is by the power of the Holy Spirit.

So that's the key to family life and you can't have the nuts and bolts of family life disconnected from the great doctrines of the Bible without harming it, without the great doctrine of the Holy Spirit. Households for the glory of God are always mingled with law and grace, with truth and love, with the word and the spirit. All, you know, beautifully balanced by the power of God working in the heart. So, use the rules of God for your family. But make sure your family is not just all about rules.

And when the individuals in your family believe in Jesus and they're filled with the Holy Spirit and are obedient to the word, it'll fill your house with the aroma of Jesus Christ. So let the rules be kept through the aroma that arises out of the Holy Spirit and the power of the resurrection. And that really is the very best aromatherapy you can give to your house. Would you pray with me? Lord we thank you for the simplicity and the beauty of all of your ways.

They are so good Lord. Thank you for blessing us with such a sense of truth and reality about life. That you give us ways in which to walk and then you give us the way in which we ought to walk through those ways. Lord, I pray you bless these families. I pray that you would bring such a Roma of love out of the Holy Spirit.

Let all be done with love. Amen.