"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word" - Ephesians 5:25-26 NKJV

The Apostle Paul presents Christ as the preeminent example of how husbands are to love and care for their wives. But how exactly does the work of Christ parallel the role of a husband? One way is in Christ's work as the church's high priest and the husband's role as priest in his home; loving and caring for his wife and his family, being patient and compassionate, interceding for them, and pleading with them to believe the promises of God.

The National Center for Family Integrated Churches welcomes Sam Waldron with the following message entitled, The scriptural warrant for the man as priest in his home. I'm indebted to Scott Brown and the organizers of this conference for the precious opportunity to speak to you about a man being a priest in his home. This subject is precious to me. I'm gonna be developing the subject of the man as a priest in his home under three sections of thought in my three messages. And they're gonna be section one, it's scriptural warrant, arguments for the man being a priest in his home.

Section two, it's classic portrait, Job's Priestly Ministry to his family, and section three, its major roles, five roles of a man as a priest in his home. And we come to the first of these sections in this hour, its scriptural warrant, arguments for a man being a priest in his home. Now I'm sure that for the mass of you, I'm speaking to the choir and I understand that. But I want to prove to you that there is a solid scriptural basis for husbands and fathers to think of themselves as priests in their home. As I said, you probably already believe it, but do you believe it scripturally?

Do you know how to prove it from the Bible? And do you know how to qualify a nuance and apply this truth biblically? Much is at stake in how we understand the scriptural warrant for a man being a priest in his home. I'm going to do this under two points in this hour. Roman numeral one, the basic arguments, and Roman numeral two, the basic applications.

First of all, the basic arguments. I want to give you a couple of illustrations about what we are to do. If you're into spy satellites, what we're going to do is take a picture. Suppose one of our spy satellites over China taking a picture of one of their missile bases. And first of all, the guys at NSA have this big picture of the entire missile base.

And then, of course, they have these super cameras where they can focus down on the northwest corner of the missile base. And then they can even take it one step farther and focus down so much that they can see the color of the guy's hair standing there. Now that's kind of what I'm going to do. I'm going to give you three arguments for the man as a priest in his home. The first is a kind of general argument.

The second, we'll focus on a little more closely. The third is what I consider the most specific and important argument. Or, if you don't like spy satellites, maybe you like hiking. I am originally, as you can tell, not from Alabama. I am from Michigan, sorry, it's true, I'm a Yankee, I had predecessors that fought in Michigan regiments in the Civil War, but I hope you'll forgive me for that.

Okay, but If you go to the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, you go to a city called Marquette, there's a national lakeshore there, and has some beautiful scenery, and you can hike up several different cliffs. Well, there might be an orphrae out there in the lake that you could see from the shore, But as you hike up to the first cliff, you're gonna be able to see it more clearly. And then when you get to the highest cliff, you're gonna be able to see it really clearly. And that's what we're gonna do. We're gonna go for a hike, we're gonna go up the lakeshore, see the first sighting of that oar freighter, go up to the higher cliffs, see the second, then go up to the highest cliff of all so we can see that oar freighter really clearly.

So that's my analogy, so that's how we're gonna do this. Either spy satellites or hiking, take your pick, okay? And the first argument is this. Priest in Israel exercised many functions of spiritual leadership in the nation identical to those functions which a man must exercise in his home. Let me say that again.

Priests in Israel exercise many functions of spiritual leadership in the nation identical to those functions which a man must exercise in his home. Consider two things here. The man must exercise spiritual or religious leadership in the home, you know the key passage, Ephesians 6, 4, please turn there, Ephesians 6, 4. Fathers do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. I wanna make four very simple statements about this passage.

It is the man who is addressed. You know what it says? Fathers. It doesn't say civil rulers, and it doesn't say mothers, and it doesn't say pastors, it says fathers, the man is addressed. The home is concerned, it has to do with your children, you see.

The spirit, I want to assert here, is priestly. Do not provoke your children to anger. You have authority, but you're not to use it in a harsh, authoritarian kind of way. You are to be and have the spirit that the Bible says a priest should have. Fathers are to be gentle and wise and benevolent in their leadership, so also priests supremely in their ministry were to be gentle and gracious.

One of the key passages here is Hebrews 5, one and two, which says, for every high priest taken from among men is appointed on behalf of men in things pertaining to God in order to offer both gifts and sacrifice for sin, he can deal gently with the ignorant and misguided since he himself also is beset with weakness. I'm asserting this weekend that that's the way we have to think of ourselves. We have to think of ourselves as beset with weakness and we have to think of our children and families as sometimes ignorant and misguided and we have to deal with them gently, gently. The word's really interesting. It means with measured emotion.

Gentleness is not a lack of emotion. Gentleness is emotion controlled. And then finally notice that the man in Ephesians 6, 4, that his work is spiritual. The man is addressed, the home is concerned, The spirit is priestly, the work is spiritual. Bring your children up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord, or in the Lord.

That phrase shows that the discipline and instruction in view here is not primarily the general education of children or their vocational training. That's important, that's the work of the family as well, but that's not what the text is talking about. It has to do with the spiritual or religious education, training and welfare of children. The phrase in the Lord, in verse one, tells children that they should have a spiritual or religious reason for obeying their parents. They should obey them in the Lord, in union, in connection with the Lord Jesus Christ.

And therefore the same phrase used in verse four tells fathers that the discipline and instruction in view here has a spiritual and religious focus. Now, we're still on to this first heading which has to do with how the priests in Israel had a lot of the same roles as the man in his home does. And that's my second thing I want to say under this first argument. This kind of leadership, such spiritual leadership, involves performing in the home many of the functions the priests performed in Israel. Such spiritual leadership involves performing in the home many of the functions the priests performed in Israel.

Such spiritual leadership involves performing in the home many of the functions the priests performed in Israel. There are five special roles in the Old Testament fulfilled by priests, which men today must fulfill in their homes. Now of course, in saying this, you understand that there are some roles that men once fulfilled in their homes as priests, which the progress of redemptive history has bestowed on other religious leaders. You understand that, right? Offering sacrifices for sin is an obvious example of this.

Men before the creation of the Old Testament, Mosaic, Levitical priesthood, offered sacrifices for sin. But when that point was reached in redemptive history, it was no longer the man's responsibility to be a priest in the sense of offering sacrifices in his home on his literal family altar, it became the duty of the high priest of Israel. All right? Nevertheless, Having stated that, I think somewhat obvious qualification. I believe that simply thinking through the other roles of the priests in Israel, which parallel those of the man in the home, will be very suggestive to you with regard to the man's spiritual priesthood.

I'm gonna open this up much more broadly, but still not broadly enough, in my third session. But I just want to give you the five roles and ask you to think about them. And here they are. The priests in Israel were intercessors for the people, and so must the man be for the family if he is to give spiritual leadership to his home. Priests were supposed to be prayers, intercessors, 2 Chronicles 30, 27.

Then the Levitical priests arose and blessed the people and their voice was heard and their prayer came to his holy dwelling place to heaven. They were to bless the people, that's another point, but they were in that blessing to pray for them. Second rule. The priests in Israel were directors of religious worship and so must the man be for the family if he is to give spiritual leadership in the home. First Kings 4, one and two, Now King Solomon was king over all Israel.

These were his officials. This is the cabinet of President Solomon. Now thankfully in the United States of America we don't have this cabinet office, but they did in Israel and it was fine. It was God's will for them. They had the first cabinet office mentioned is this.

These were his officials, Azariah the son of Zadok was the priest. That is to say, he was the one in charge of religion in Israel, He was the secretary of religion. And so you see, that's what priests were. They were people who let other people in the worship of the living God. Third role.

The priests in Israel were mediators of divine blessing. And so must the man be for the family if he is to give spiritual leadership in the home. Again, Numbers chapter six contains this description of the work of a priest. Then the Lord spoke to Moses saying, speak to Aaron and to his sons saying, thus you shall bless the sons of Israel. You shall say to them, the Lord bless you and keep you, the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you, the Lord lift up his countenance on you and give you peace.

So as they shall invoke my name on the sons of Israel and I then will bless them. Priests were to be blessers. They in some sense pronounced divine blessing, they did pronounce divine blessing on Israel. And men, it is revealed in the Old Testament, and it is revealed throughout the Bible, are also to be those who bless their families. We will see in our third session tomorrow, we will see that men will bless their families or they will curse them.

And there is no alternative to those two possibilities. So men are to be blessers of their families. That's the third role of a priest that applies both to priests in Israel and to men in their homes. Fourthly, the priests in Israel were instructors in scripture. They were instructors in sacred scripture and so must the man be in the home if he is to give spiritual leadership to the family.

Malachi 2.7, for the lips of a priest should preserve knowledge, and men should seek instruction from his mouth, for he is the messenger of the Lord of hosts. And so priests were to be instructors in sacred scripture and so are meant to be in their home, they are to bring their children up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. And then fifthly, the priest in Israel were adjudicators or judges in holy things. And so must the man be in and for the family if he is to give spiritual leadership in the home. There's a difference between being a legal scholar and being a judge.

A legal scholar gets to sit in school and theorize. Most of us men are pretty good at that. You know, sitting there on our rocking chairs, solving the world's problems. Sitting there theorizing about the imputation of Adam's sin. What we're not so good at is being practical judges with regard to holy things in our homes.

But this is what a priest had to be. Deuteronomy 17, 9 to 12, so you shall come to the Levitical priest or the judge who is in office in those days, and you shall inquire of them, and they will declare to you the verdict in the case." Verse 12, the man who acts presumptuously by not listening to the priest who stands there to serve the Lord your God, nor to the judge, that man shall die. Thus you shall purge the evil from Israel. So priests were to be judges, not just legal scholars, not just teaching the law, they were to be a pliers of the law, authoritatively, in Israel. So must a man be in his home?

With such parallels before us, let me conclude my first argument, the one from the shore of Lake Superior. With such parallels before us, is it possible to resist the thought that the man occupies a position of spiritual priesthood in the home. Second argument, now we're gonna do a little hike, we're going to go up to the first cliff there, we're gonna take another look out at that orphrater in Lake Superior, we're gonna see it more clearly. My second argument is this. Priests in the Old Testament were viewed as spiritual fathers, and thus it is natural to think of fathers as spiritual priests.

Priests in the Old Testament were viewed as spiritual fathers, and thus it's natural to think of fathers as spiritual priests. Now there are two biblical facts which support this argument, of which you must be aware, in order to thoroughly appreciate the solid foundations of this statement. The first concerns the original order after creation. The original order after creation. It is evident from the Old Testament accounts of the period after the fall and before the Mosaic Covenant that priesthood arose first in the form of the father and husband in the home.

It's evident from the Old Testament that in the period before the Levitical priesthood was set up, it was fathers who were priests, priests in their homes. They even offered literal sacrifices and burnt offerings in behalf of their family on their own family literal altars. We may leave aside, if you wish, the examples of Melchizedek, Genesis 14, and Jethro, who probably were priests in their homes, but seemed to have exercised a broader priesthood over a clan or even a nation. But even leaving such examples aside, we still have the examples of Noah, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, and Job, all of them clear examples of men who exercised a priesthood on behalf of their families, which included the offering of burnt offerings on their literal family altars. That's the original order after creation.

It supports the idea of associating priesthood with a man in his home. You see that? But not only does the original order after creation support it, the common thinking in Israel supports it. And here, I have to turn you to two passages in that very interesting and often misinterpreted, probably, book of Judges. Turn to Judges chapter 17.

Judges is one of those books that is not intended, it's a narrative portion of scripture, it's not intended to tell us how things should be, it's intended to tell us how things should not be, or that is to say, it's intended to tell us what happens when There is no king in Israel, and every man does what is right in his own eyes. These are bad examples, that is to say. But nonetheless, as we go along, we do learn some things from this passage that are very instructive. Look at Judges 17, 10. Verse nine says, Micah said to him, where do you come from?

He said to him, I am a Levite from Bethlehem and Judah and I'm going to stay wherever I may find a place. To Micah, Micah then said to him, dwell with me and be a father and a priest to me, and I will give you 10 pieces of silver a year, a suit of clothes, and your maintenance. Look at 18 verse 19 then. Now the men of Dan have come along and they're gonna steal this poor Micah's whole temple, priesthood, and all the money that went along with it. Judges 18, 19.

They said to him, be silent, put your hand over your mouth and come with us, be to us a father and a priest. Is it better for you to be a priest in the house of one man or to be a priest to a tribe and a family in Israel? Well, this priest wasn't a very good priest. He liked the sound of that, power and money, and so he left with them. Now, this is, as I have said, these passages are found in the highly chaotic condition of Israel during the period of the judges.

But I don't believe this is relevant to the simple point I want to make from them. That basic point is this, that in the thinking of Israelites during this early period, The roles of a father and a priest were closely associated. You saw that in the two texts, didn't you? Micah, who is of the tribe of Ephraim, uses the terminology a father and a priest. So also do members of the tribe of Dan both use this terminology, which so closely associates fatherhood and priesthood, in speaking to a Levite who grew up in the tribe of Judah.

Thus, in these two passages, this pattern of associating priesthood and fatherhood is shown to be common to the thinking of at least a third of the tribes of Israel. And when we combine this common thinking in Israel with what we have seen was the original order after creation, it's necessary to conclude that this association between fatherhood and priesthood was not a corruption unique to the period of the judges, but a common inheritance from the patriarchs of Israel. We rightly conclude, therefore, that our second argument is fully validated. Priests in the Old Testament were viewed as spiritual fathers and thus it's natural to think of fathers as spiritual priests. So, we've seen the big picture of the Chinese missile base with our spy satellite, and then we've blown this picture up and got a better view of the northwest corner.

Now we're gonna see if there are any bold Chinese men down there, okay? And that's what we do now, was we come to our third argument. Our third argument. Christ, Christ at the point precisely of his priestly work is made the great model of the chief duty of husbands to their wives. And what passage do you suppose I'm thinking about here?

Ephesians chapter five, that's right, please turn there. Ephesians chapter five. Verses 25 to 27 particularly. Husbands, love your wives just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself up for her so that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that he might present to himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she would be holy and blameless. Now, I assert that the language of verses 25 to 27 speaks of Christ's work as priestly in character.

Now, before I try to prove that, think of what that implies, if that's true. If this is true, what follows? It follows that what Christ was in his priestly work for the church, the husband should be to his wife. He should be a priest to his wife. From this it would immediately follow that in some sense, as I've just said, the man is to be a priest to his wife.

But now we must take up the crux of the matter. Is the language here of verses 25 to 27 really priestly in character? And the answer to that question is yes in amazing detail. There are four words used here which have patent and obvious priestly connections. The first is the word in verse 25, gave himself up.

Gave himself up. This speaks of a priestly action. Same verb is used in verse two of this chapter. And walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave himself up for us an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma. This is Christ giving himself up as a sacrifice.

This is a priest offering a sacrifice. And this passage in verse two, gave himself up, is explicitly a priestly work. Second word. In verse 26, the verb sanctify also specifies a priestly activity. The verb sanctify also specifies a priestly activity.

You see it there? So that he might sanctify her. Now, here I've got a little explaining to do, don't I? Because most of you know that sanctifying in the Bible is associated with the Holy Spirit and what he does in Christian's hearts. In dwelling them and making them holy And that's what we normally think of.

That's what the children's catechism says. What is sanctification? It's God making us holy in heart and conduct. And that is indeed the way the Bible often uses the word and the word sanctified is often primarily the work of the Holy Spirit. That's all true.

The idea of people becoming Christians and merely being, as I was taught when I was a boy, positionally sanctified so that they're sanctified in theory, they're sanctified legally, but nothing in the world has changed about their heart and conduct, is a lie born in the pit of hell. I'm not teaching that to you, okay? What I am saying is this. In the Bible, the word sanctify is also used of priestly activity. And it's used of priestly activity in this way throughout the book of Hebrews.

Turn to the book of Hebrews. Hebrews Chapter two, verse 11, and I can show you many examples of this, I think most of the uses of the hagiadzo, that is to say the sanctify root in Hebrews, actually fall into this particular category. But Hebrews 2.11 is important. For both he who sanctifies and those who are sanctified are all from one father, for which reason he is not ashamed to call them brethren, saying. Now, I'm lifting that little text up out of its context, but if you understand its context, you know the whole context is talking about how Jesus had to become a man to be a priest for us.

He had to share our nature in order to make propitiation for the sins of his people. He had not just to be God, he had to be man. And this is what the following verses are all about, verses 14 to 18. This whole passage, as this whole book, is about Jesus as a priest, alright? And the analogy that the writer is drawing here is to say, then the Old Testament, the priest of Israel, had to be from the seed of Abraham, and it was for the seed of Abraham that they intervened, that they did their priestly activity.

Both those who were sanctified, both he who sanctifies and those who are sanctified are all from one father. The priest had to be a member of the same nation, descended from the same man that the people were for whom he interceded. You see that? And so when it talks about he who sanctifies here, it's not talking about the Holy Spirit. It's not talking about the third person of the Trinity.

It's talking about the second person of the Trinity as he became incarnate, died on a cross to make propitiation for the sins of the people. And that's how he sanctifies them. Look at Hebrews 10, 10. Speaking of the will of the Father, that his son should come, take on flesh, and then suffer on behalf of his people, that's the will in question. We read here in verse 10, by this will we have been sanctified through the offering of the body of Jesus Christ once for all.

You see, we've been sanctified, not through the Holy Spirit indwelling us and making us holy in heart and conduct, although that is true for every Christian. But here, the sanctifying work is the work that is accomplished by the offering of the body of Jesus Christ once for all. Look at verse 14. For by one offering, he has perfected for all time those who are sanctified. Look at chapter 13, verse 12.

Therefore, Jesus also, that he might sanctify the people through his own blood suffered outside the gate. Now let me tell you why the author of Hebrews chooses this word to talk about the work of Jesus Christ and the effect of the offering of the body of Jesus Christ. Because the author of Hebrews conceives the work of salvation as bringing sinners into the very presence of God. It conceives of the work of salvation as bringing sinners into the holiest of all. How do you get a sinner into the holiest of all without killing him instantly?

Well you don't get him in there by the present imperfect holiness the Holy Spirit is working in us. How do you get a sinner right now into the holiest of all? You get him there in one way and one way only through the perfect righteousness and holiness of Jesus Christ. It's only when men and women and children are clothed with that perfect holiness that they can walk into the holiest of all because they have a righteousness that meets the standard of the burning holiness of God. You see it?

And that's why the author of Hebrews uses this word sanctified to talk about the results of the work of Christ, because you have to be holy to go into the presence of God, and That's what salvation is, to worship in the presence of God, to go into the holy of holies, to worship in the holiest of all. That's a wonderful subject. It deserves a lot more time than I'm gonna give it. But now if you turn back to Ephesians five, you see that this is what he's talking about, Paul is talking about here as well. Christ loved the church, gave himself up for her, in a language very similar to the book of Hebrews, no I'm not arguing for the Paulian authorship of the book of Hebrews.

I'm not arguing against it either. I'm just saying, in language very similar to Hebrews, we read he gave himself up for her so that he might sanctify her. Make her holy, Fit for the very presence of God. A fit bride for the holy son of God. And then a third word used in these verses is the verb having cleansed.

There in verse 26 as well, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word. Now this verb having cleansed also has priestly connections. Again, Hebrews is relevant here. In Hebrews 1-3, we read of how the Son of God made purification of sins. That's the very same word used here.

But most significant of all is the passage in Hebrews to which I want to turn you now. It's the only place besides this passage in the entire New Testament where the verb sanctify and the verb cleansed are used together. They're used together here in Ephesians 5, 26. And they're used together in Hebrews 9, 13, and 14. Look at that.

Hebrews 9, 13, and 14, forth the blood of goats and bulls and the ashes of a heifer, sprinkling those who have been defiled, sanctify, here it is, for the cleansing of the flesh. How much more will the blood of Christ do through the eternal spirit, offered himself without blemish to God, cleanse your conscience from dead works to serve the living God. So here in Hebrews 9.14, plainly sanctifying and cleansing are the work of a priest. It is Christ who has appeared as a high priest of the good things to come, who by his blood sanctifies and cleanses the people. That is to say, he makes them fit for the presence of a holy God and removes the sense of moral defilement they have in their consciences.

But, going back to Ephesians five once more, and for good measure, there is a fourth word that has priestly connections here. And it is the word washing in verse 26. The washing of water with the word. This word is also closely associated with the activity of a priest. Hebrews 9, 13, and 10, 21, and 22, I won't turn you back to them, use this very word washing.

And they use it of that water used to sprinkle and cleanse ceremonial defilement, the Old Covenant. This water was prepared when they burnt a red heifer to ashes and put the ashes in water, and they use that for ceremonial cleansing in the Old Testament, okay? It's that word, it's that idea that's being mentioned in Hebrews nine and 10 with the word washing, and it's that Old Testament figurative language that Paul is drawing on here to speak of what a husband should do for his wife. He should cleanse her and wash her with the water of the word. And that means not just exhortation, it means the water of the gospel of Christ.

Encouraging her to repent of her sins, encouraging her more than that to believe in the promises of the gospel, encouraging her to believe that if she confesses her sins, she's cleansed by the blood of Jesus Christ. This is the work of a priest. It's the work of a husband washing his wife with the word of God. Now, let me return to my point. We've said that if Paul is indeed speaking of Christ as a priest in Ephesians 5, 25 to 27, that he is calling men to imitate the example of Christ as a priest in calling them to be a priest to their wives and to love their wives.

But we have proven several times over that he is thinking of Christ as a priest and we are then justified in holding as proven our third inconclusive proof that the man must be a priest in his home. Christ, at the point precisely of his priestly work, has made the great model of the chief duty of a man to his wife, right? And now, standing up that nut cliff on Lake Superior, we can see this or freighter really clearly, can't we? Those are my basic arguments that I have for the scriptural warrant for a man as a priest in his home. And now I come in closing, but don't get your hopes up too soon, to the basic applications, five of them, okay?

The basic applications of the man as a priest in his home. Here's the first one. This gives us a central paradigm for masculine headship. A central paradigm or example or model, if you will. A central paradigm for masculine headship.

We live in a society that is permeated through and through with feminism, egalitarianism, and effeminate views of what it means to be a man. Can I amen for that? It is easy in such a society to react against such views and in such a context into harsh and authoritarian perspectives about what the Bible means when it calls us as men to be heads of our home. How do you know that? Because I did it.

That's why. And because I suspect some of you did the same thing. I remember the shock I got when a girl I was dating turned out to be a feminist. And the reaction I had to that, okay. So why do I think it's possible to react into harsh and authoritarian views of male headship?

It's because I did it. And I don't think you guys are much different than me. When I was in college in the late 60s, Yes, I graduated from high school in 1969. Do you know what was happening in 1969? The Vietnam War and free love and the hippie movement.

That's when I graduated from high school. I didn't get any of that because I was a fundamentalist, but anyway, when I was in college in the late 60s and early 70s, feminism was just becoming mainstream. When I first encountered a girl, as I was saying, that I was dating, I countered it and I countered it in her, I detested it, and as I look back, I see that this caused me, for too long, to adopt what I will call harsh, dominating, and authoritarian perspectives and practices with regard to the masculine leadership role God had given me as a man. Now, so many years later, I believe that one of the great solutions to that kind of overreaction, those kind of harsh authoritarian views of what it means to be a man and a leader in our homes, I believe that one of the great solutions to this imbalance is to embrace the idea that this headship God has given us is preeminently priestly in character. I can't prove it now.

I hope that you'll see the validity of it if I just say it. I would argue that though Christ has three offices of prophet, priest, and king, that the most central and foundational of those offices as the savior of sinners and therefore as our savior is the priestly office. And I think I can prove that from the Bible. And what I'm saying here is that though we must be kings and prophets in our homes, it is important for us, especially in our day and age, particularly in this society, to think of that headship as priestly in character. And therefore suffused with a gentleness that priests ought to have, therefore permeated with the kind of concern for those we're leading, because that's the whole point of our office.

We're priests for other people. We're appointed by God in behalf of men as priests. What I'm saying to you is we need to think of ourselves in this way, and if we do, we'll let ourselves run away into harsh authoritarian self-centered views of male headship, and it'll keep us focused where we should be on the gentleness and other centeredness of the leadership that God has given us. So I think it's appropriate for us to see the priestly office and headship of Christ as the central paradigm for leadership as men in our homes. I think if we do this, it'll keep us from being harsh and self-serving and authoritarian in the way we lead our families.

And I think that's a message that I know I needed to hear and that was one of the most striking things to me in developing this material a number of years ago, and I hope it's as striking to you. A second thing we then learn, following right from that, is this, this study then also teaches us something of what it means for us to be a priest to our wife. We must love her by showing an abiding concern for her spiritual welfare and progress. Believe me, if you feel convicted when you say that, I feel convicted when I preach it. But it's true.

We must love her by showing an abiding concern for her spiritual welfare and progress and we must seek that welfare by washing her with the priestly cleansing water of the word of God and the gospel of God. We should also speak to our wife regarding these spiritual matters. We can't teach her if we don't speak to her. I guess that's kind of obvious, isn't it? But the problem is that's exactly what most of us have a problem doing.

And that is just talking to our wives as we should. And so these two things, loving and speaking, are just the areas where so many men fail. We must confess our sin in this matter to God, our wife, ourselves, and begin by the grace of God to treat our wives and our children in a priestly manner. A third application. There's a crucial perspective here for us when we fail as priests.

A crucial perspective for when men fail as a priest. Wise and children should also respect a man's priestly authority and support him in his priestly roles even when he fails them. Hannah is a wonderful example of this in 1 Samuel 1. You ever think about this? Eli was far from an ideal priest.

We're gonna hear about that I think this weekend. And Hannah must have known, how could she not have known, that at least that he was not ideal priest. And she must have known it, at least from the way he falsely accused her of being drunk, of all things. And yet, to all of this, to Eli, even when he's falsely accusing her of being drunk in the house of God, she responds with a simple and respectful, no, my Lord. It's the first Samuel 1.15.

Hannah's example should encourage us to ask our wives and our children to support us and submit to us, even though our best efforts will fall short. When a wife uses her husband's remaining sin as an excuse for her lack of respect, she needs to be reminded that there was only one perfect man and she's not married to him. Kids should remember that no matter how much they want to be like their father, he's not perfect. Our wife and children may think that We have no right to question or even exhort them because of our own sins and failures. And it's easy for our own consciences to say that to us, isn't it?

And it's true that we've got to humbly confess those sins to God and to our wives and to our children if we're going to hope to maintain any kind of godly leadership in our homes. We're going to sin. The only thing to do about it is to confess it to God and to our families if we sin in front of them. But even a flawed priest, which we all are and will be, must still fulfill his duties. Your failings aren't a reason to become no priest at all.

Your failings as a priest cannot be a reason to become a worse priest and no priest at all. We will sometimes make mistakes, just as our wife and children will make mistakes. Given our sinful natures, the only way for us not to make such mistakes would be to do nothing at all, and that would mean to abandon our role completely. But that would make for even worse problems, wouldn't it? But we're so confused, aren't we?

I know a man who I counseled. He was afraid, so he said, and I don't think he was being completely perverse in saying this, to lead his family in family worship because his children would think he was a hypocrite if he did that, because they'd seen all his failings. And so, Sordio was arguing, it's good for him to be an even worse dad than he is because of his failings. Because he didn't want to be a hypocrite. Well, what's the response we have to make to that?

Man, confess your sins to God. Go to your children and confess your sins to them. And when you sin again, keep confessing them. But don't make that an excuse not to be a father at all. It may be difficult to give respect to a sinful man.

But those who don't give respect to sinful men will give respect to no one in this world, will they? That applies to a lot of things. Fourth application, this is a vital call for young men to prepare for priesthood. Even a man who's not yet a husband, and I assume that many of you here are in that condition, should see his need for priestly qualification if he ever wants to be a proper husband and father in the future. If we desire, if we have as young men, desires to become a leader of a home, have a wife and then have children, probably we're more interested in having the wife first, but that's all right.

We must possess the ability to fulfill all the necessary roles of a priest. We must be concerned about God's holiness and about people's sinfulness. We must have the spirit of a priest, at least in some measure. A priest exists for the sake of others. A priest deals gently with others.

And so peculiar self-denial is a requirement for priesthood. If a young man is so self-indulgent that he can't deny himself now, it's a good sign he's not qualified to deny himself and to be a priest in his family's home. If he's so irresponsible that he isn't leading a productive life now, a prospective wife will not look at him, should not look at him at least, as a man she wants to lead her, whose team she wants to join. We must prepare now, young men, for future responsibilities. And then fifthly and lastly, there is here an essential reminder of man's only hope to be a priest.

I'm glad that our last argument made us focus on Jesus priesthood. We are reminded by this of the fundamental office and work of Christ. It is crucial that we always keep the basic and central character of Christ's priesthood in view. There are times when the church has largely lost this vision of the priesthood of Christ being central. I think the medieval church have lost it and focused on Christ as King.

And weary and ignorant souls fled to Mary and the saints for comfort and access to God. To avoid this trap, we must always remind ourselves of what our basic problem is. We need a priest to minister to us because in ourselves we are condemned, defiled, and excluded from God's presence. We must be cleansed, justified, and sanctified by Christ our high priest if we aren't of any glimpse of God's presence. And not only so, if we have any shot at being a priest in our home, we need the cleansing, the washing, the sanctifying work of Christ our high priest in us.

And we need to remember that since we need the Holy Spirit to become holy in heart and conduct, that the only place the Holy Spirit can be gotten is from Jesus Christ. God gave the Holy Spirit to him first as a spirit of wisdom and understanding, counsel and strength, knowledge and the fear of the Lord, as the spirit of Yahweh. He poured him out on Jesus Christ. Christ died so that he might pour him out on us. And we need the spirit's wisdom for our folly.

We need the Spirit's strength for our weakness. And we need the Spirit's fear of the Lord for our depravity and self-centeredness, don't we? And so I plead with you, no matter how heavy, burdensome these responsibilities feel, no matter how much you feel like you failed in them. The solution to all of that, the forgiveness and the cleansing and the new strength to go forward is found in the one who is our great example, our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Let's pray.

Father, we're so thankful for the word of God, for the picture of the Lord Jesus Christ that you've given us there, for the hope and help we have in him. Our only sadness, Lord, is with ourselves and that we model Him and we show Him in such poor ways in our life and conduct. Oh, make us more like Him. Give us the fruit of the Spirit. Love, joy, peace, long suffering, gentleness and goodness, faithfulness, meekness and self-control.

Give us these things as men are home, we pray. In Jesus' name, amen. For more messages, articles and videos on the subject of conforming the church and the family to the word of God and for more information about the National Center for Family Integrated Churches where you