God calls his people to grow in personal holiness and to become more and more like Jesus Christ. But this holiness is not mere rule keeping - it begins with our inward transformation by the grace of God. This heart change will change how we live and in this lifelong fight against sin God has given us great helps. One of these helps is the example of a holy father. Fathers who are seeking to grow in practical holiness are examples to their children and powerful influences for building up children to become holy themselves.

Our God, I pray that these would be holy moments. I pray that these would be your moments where your spirit would be present to come alongside us to stir up our hearts to make us a holy people, yours, set apart unto you for whatever seems good and pleasing to you. Help us Lord in Jesus' name we pray, amen. My topic this morning is equipped for holiness. How can fathers be alongside their sons to help them grow in holiness?

The life of a Christian is the life of growing in holiness. There's so little holiness in your life on the day which you're born again. You have to grow in it day by day, week by week, month by month, year by year. When we think about holiness, our minds almost invariably go right to sexual purity, where in the mind of a man, they're equated. One is equivalent to the other.

And I think that's because sexual purity is such an ongoing struggle in the life of a man that when we think about difficulties associated with holiness, we think about this one category. I'm going to get there, but I'm not going to start there, because holiness is a much broader category than just sexual purity. I'd like to just make three points in my 20 minutes. The first is to speak of the root of holiness. What is the beginning point of holiness?

Second, a word to fathers. I'm going to exhort us, fathers. And then thirdly, a word to sons. Sons, I'm going to exhort you, and then we'll be done. So number one, the root of holiness.

What is the starting point of holiness? What is the beginning of holiness without which there is no holiness? The root of holiness is union with Jesus Christ. The root of holiness is union with Jesus Christ. If there is no union with Jesus Christ, There can be no real holiness.

You must be joined to the Son of God by faith, or there might be an outward approximation, an outward appearance of holiness, but there is no true biblical real holiness. You must repent and believe the gospel. That is the starting point for all holiness, without which there is no true holiness. There's only an outward faking of holiness. You must be joined to Jesus Christ by faith.

You must repent and believe the gospel. Why is that? Well, that's because being joined to the Lord Jesus Christ by faith, believing that He is who He said He is, and laying hold of his work, his shedding his blood on the cross, is what brings the Holy Spirit into your heart and life. And the Holy Spirit is that member of the godhead who makes us holy you cannot make yourself holy the holy spirit a spirit who is holy he is the holy spirit he makes his dwelling places holy uh... I'm I'm sure you've tried harder only to fail.

Have you ever done that? Anyone who has been either inside or outside of the Lord knows this. Turning over a new leaf, aspiring to do better, that does not lead to holiness. That doesn't mean that we don't strive for holiness, but that means that at the core is this member of the Godhead who indwells believers, people who have repented and believed the gospel, who have been joined to Jesus Christ, who are in union with Jesus Christ. The Holy Spirit indwells them, and he is a Holy Spirit, and he makes his dwelling places progressively holier and holier and holier day by day.

So you cannot be holy without that. You cannot be holy. You cannot make progress in real holiness without the indwelling of the Holy Spirit who begins to clean up the house, who begins to make his dwelling place holy. Now what does holiness mean? A lot of times we equate holiness with righteousness, and I do know why we do that.

In some ways it's very appropriate. What the Holy Spirit makes holy is we're growing in righteousness when that happens. We're growing and loving the things that God loves and hating the things that God hates when we grow in holiness. Holiness does bring righteousness in our lives, and so there's very much overlap, but they're not exactly the same thing. Holiness simply means to be set apart unto.

So the perfect example of that is the holy things, the holy things in the temple, in the Old Testament temple. There were implements, there was an altar, there were objects to be used in the worship of God, and they're called holy, they are consecrated things. Now are they righteous? They're inanimate objects. How can an inanimate object be either righteous or unrighteous?

So you can see while there may be overlap, they're not exactly the same thing. They are holy because they are set apart unto the worship of God. God says, these things are just for this purpose to worship me and a holy person is like the altar in the Old Testament temple is like the implements the candle stands and the the showbread in the Old Testament temple that they are holy because they are gods they are set apart to be God they are consecrated to it to one purpose and that is that to be unto his glory and to serve his purposes in this world. That's what holiness is. Growth in holiness does mean growth in righteousness, but it really means that God has put his hand upon you to call you his own, and he has said, you are mine, you are for my pleasure and my purposes that's what it means to be holy and so yes when you are gods he has put his hand upon you to say you're mine you used to be of the world, you are not to be of the world any longer, you are to be for me and my pleasure and my purposes, you do grow in righteousness.

You do grow in loving the things that he loves and hating the things that he hates. So holiness is that. It's to be set apart unto. It's to be bought, purchased with something precious. This is what Christians are.

They are purchased with something precious, the blood of the Son of God. Jesus shed His blood to buy you up out of the world, and that mess of sin in this world and in your heart, He bought you out of that, and He says, you are Mine like the altar in the Old Testament temple is His for His pleasure and His purposes and His worship. That is what holiness is. And the root of holiness, the root of it has nothing to do with the outward things. Now it works its way out into the outward things, but if you start with outward things, do these things, don't do these things, you are lost, you will never be a holy man.

You start with the inward things. You start with union with Jesus Christ so that you can be declared righteous, made clean by his cleansing blood. Though you are scarlet, you become as white as snow, because you are joined with Christ, because he is who he is, and he has done what he has done to buy up a people with his blood. This is the root of holiness. Inward, inward, inward in the heart, set apart unto through union with Christ you have to start here and so we want to look sons in the eyes and say sons okay that outward things matter to us yes we are dealing with you on on the outward level on behavior because we have a harder time getting at the inward things but sons.

It is so possible to conform you to outward standards but your heart is untouched and you will never be holy. You'll only ever be a Pharisee. You'll only ever have an outward shell that looks sort of like holiness on the outside but your heart has never been changed. Oh, throw yourself upon Christ, sons. We plead with you to throw yourself upon Christ.

This is the root of holiness. Number two, a word to fathers. Fathers, helping to equip our sons for holiness depends on the cultivation of personal holiness. You wanna help your son grow in holiness, be a holy man. Cultivate personal holiness.

This is the word to fathers. Helping to equip our sons for holiness depends on our cultivating personal holiness. Sons need to see us chasing after the Lord, seeking the Lord, cultivating a lifestyle that says He is God and King to me. He is God and King to me. The things that matter to him matter to me.

They need to catch us going away to be with Him in secret. They need to catch us doing that from time to time. They need to catch us with a cup of coffee and our Bibles early in the morning or late at night pursuing Him and stiff arming sin and with the world shrinking in our lives, okay? The world is either—usually is either growing or shrinking in your life. Isn't that true?

The things of the world, the things that have nothing— no connection to God at all, the things that the world is chasing out after those things, are we chasing after those things? Are we stiffer sin in the world or are we on a trajectory where we are drawing sin and the world close, we cannot help our sons, we cannot equip them for holiness. We cannot help them to grow in holiness. Sons need to see us seeking the Lord and stiff-arming, diminishing sin and the world in our lives because we are cultivating personal holiness so we can help them grow in something that we're growing in. It will help them grow in it if they see us growing in it.

Particularly as sons get older, fathers with sons who are now 11 and 12 and 13 and older, as sons get older, we as fathers need to not be drawn away from looking them in the eye and asking them probing and difficult questions, especially in this category of sexual purity by personal compromise. We need as fathers not to be drawn away from looking them right in the eye and asking them the hard questions, but we withdraw from that because of personal compromise in our lives. Personal compromise makes you spiritually impotent. It drains spiritual power out of you. You know this is true, brothers.

You know This is true. You know that what we should be doing with our older sons is periodically, frequently looking in the eye and asking them the hard questions, the probing questions, especially in this category of sexual purity, but you know that we lose the ability to do that with this when we are succumbing and personally compromising in that. You shrink back because you know that you have no standing grounds to ask those questions. There are men in this tent who will not ask their sons those questions, I have no doubt in my mind, there are men in this tent who will not ask their sons those questions because of personal compromise in their lives, they cannot help their sons grow in holiness because they are not holy men. They are not cultivating personal holiness and so they cannot help their sons grow in holiness.

Number three, a word to sons. Sons. Now we're getting right to the category of sexual purity, so this is especially for sons who are getting older. This is the threefold counsel to Christians, again, the root of holiness being union with Christ, repenting and believing the gospel. But once that root exists, how does the scripture counsel men to cultivate personal holiness in the category of sexual purity?

It is a three-fold counsel, and I'll give it to you. It is run, and it is starve, and it is amputate this is the threefold Council of Scripture one run listen to 2nd Timothy 2 verse 22 2nd Timothy 2 verse 22 flee also useful youthful lusts flee also youthful lusts, but pursue righteousness, faith, love, peace with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart. So starting at the end, he's talking to people who call on the Lord out of a pure heart, out of a cleansed heart, union with Christ, this is who this is to. What is the counsel to them? It is flee and pursue.

Flee what? Flee youthful lusts. Flee. Run away from them as Joseph ran away from sexual temptation. He didn't stick around.

He ran. Flee youthful lusts. Second, starve. Listen to 1 Peter 2 verse 11. 1 Peter 2 verse 11.

Beloved, I beg you as sojourners and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts which war against the soul. He's calling you to act like there's a war on. Some of us are way too comfortable. Some of us are acting like there's not a war on when you have an enemy that wants to kill you through sexual defilements and he never sleeps and he never slumbers his malice never takes the rest his hatred towards you never takes a rest, but you act like there's not a war on and he wants to kill you and he never sleeps. They war against the soul.

There is a war on to drag you into hell Peter begs you as sojourners and pilgrims in other words Stop being so comfortable here and act like you are what you are which is a short timer here. This is not our home. We are sojourners and pilgrims. Our home is in heaven. We're just being called upon to act like it.

What does it mean to act like it it's abstain from fleshly lust there are inclinations that draw you starve them abstain from them deprive them of the food that makes them grow and dominate you. Abstain. Starve them. Thirdly, amputate. If you have a Bible turn to Matthew 15.

Amputate. Amputate. Amputate amputate run second timothy to sis fully star first peter to sis abstain amputate matthew five verses twenty seven three thirty amputate Matthew 5 verses 27 through 30 Jesus says you have heard that it was said to those of old you shall not commit adultery Jesus says you heard, don't do this outward act. You heard, don't do this outward act. But I say to you, Jesus is explaining what that law has always meant, that it's not just about an outward act, that it is about what is happening in your heart, but I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

If your right eye causes you to sin, pluck it out and cast it from you. For it is more profitable for you that one of your members perish than for your whole body to be cast into hell. Jesus uses things that are lawful and that are close to you. An eye and a hand. Nothing unlawful about your eye and your hand.

Some of us have allowed things to persist and exist in our lives that are lawful and close to us, but that draw us into sin when we should have cut them off and thrown them from us. It's not talking about unlawful things or things out there. It is talking about even, not exclusively, but even lawful things. There's nothing wrong with having an eye you're not violating any law by having an eye or by having a hand And yet Jesus says if that brings you into sin, no matter how lawful, no matter how close to you, you cut it off and throw it from you. Why?

Because heaven and hell are at stake in these things. Dads, we have to help our sons grow in holiness. They need a partner. They need an authority, but they also need a friend who's been through the wars. We can help them.

We've been through the wars. Our failures can even be an asset in helping our sons. I've failed too much. Resolve right now to begin cultivating personal holiness like we've never cultivated personal holiness and to even use our failures to come alongside and to help our sons. To Partner with them in the growth of holiness, but always aim for the heart.

Always aim for union with Christ. They must have union with Christ or they're not even at the starting point of holiness. Let's pray. Father, we know that your son is worthy of holy men. We know that we are not holy as we ought to be.

We fall down before you in our hearts and beg you to forgive us and pray that you would make us holy men, that your Holy Spirit indwelling us would make His dwelling place holy, that He would accelerate His work in our lives, Help us to cultivate personal holiness by your grace through your spirit. Pray that you would make us precious partners to our sons in growth and holiness. Help us to help them be what we've not been but should have been. Help us to grow in our own holiness. We pray in Jesus' name, amen.