Over the years, many people have written both positively and negatively about Church and Family Life. Here are the seven most common mischaracterizations.
Church and Family Life redefines the nature of the church as a “Family of Families.”
False. Our understanding of the nature of the church is consistent with the historic doctrinal statements of the faith including the second London Baptist Confession of 1689, the Westminster Confession of Faith, the Heidelberg Catechism and The Baptist Faith and Message 2000. Many years ago, we said, “the church is a spiritual family of families.” Some said we were presenting a new definition for the church when in fact we were not speaking of the nature of the church at all. All we meant is that a separate jurisdiction – a family - comes to church and it needs to be acknowledged as such and equipped to be a biblical family. We were not redefining the nature of the church.
Church and Family Life believes that the church is an extension of the family.
False. We do not believe the church is an extension of the family, rather they are separate yet complimentary institutions.
Church and Family Life wrongfully places the family over the church in priority.
False. We have plainly stated that we believe the church is supreme among the institutions for it is eternal while the family is temporal.
Church and Family Life believes that the church should be family-based.
False. We do not believe that the church should be family-based. We believe that the foundation and center of attention of the church ought to be the Lord Jesus Christ and His gospel. Further, we believe that families form critical building blocks of the church in the sense that families send their members to church and if you have weak and unbiblical family life, you will have a weak church.
Church and Family Life believes that the church can only relate to family members through the father.
False. We do not believe that the church must always work through or communicate through a father. We believe that the church has authority to discipline and instruct every individual believer in the family not just the head of the family, or through the head of the family.
Church and Family Life believes that the whole family must always be together for all gatherings
False. We have never said that the whole family must be together for all gatherings nor have we said that “the church has no right to teach its members and the children of its members in situations where the entire family is not present.”
Church and Family Life believes that the biblical pattern for church life is age-integrated
True, we believe that the indisputable discipleship pattern presented in the bible is age-integrated and not age-segregated. Further, we maintain that the comprehensive age segregation that rules the church today violates the patterns of scripture and that the biblical burden of proof lies with those who practice it.
Church and Family Life has written a "declaration" that explains its understanding of the necessity of harmony between the separate jurisdictions of church and family.
We have many free audio messages on these subjects where we plainly state our positions on the audio resources section of our website. Check out messages entitled "What is a Family Integrated Church" and "The Biblical Case for Family Integrated Discipleship." Also, let me recommend that you listen to “What About Home Churching?” where we make a case for what is a true church and why many churches meeting in homes may be unbiblical.