One of the great blessings of life is family. God, in His sovereign mercy, has lovingly placed us in households, and Scripture paints a beautiful picture of household enjoyment. Indeed, one of the ways we glorify God is to participate in joyful and holy households that love one another deeply and seek to honor Christ. In this message, Carlton McLeod will give an overview of Paul’s concise but profoundly rich letter to the church at Colossae, and exposit chapter three, which unfolds divine precept for God-glorifying churches and glad, hopeful homes. 

Always a pleasure to be here at the church and family life conference our text will come from The power-packed epistle of Colossians if you find chapter 3 and verse 16, please stand with me as we read God's Word Colossians chapter 3 and verse 16 my assignment is to talk to you about glorifying and enjoying god and the family and I am truly honored to do so. I'm reading from the King James version of the Bible. I'm not King James only. I just like it. Uh so, I hope that's okay.

Uh Colossians chapter three verse sixteen reading down through the end of the chapter and the word of the lord says, let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord and whatever ye do in word or deed Do all in the name of the Lord Jesus? Giving thanks to god and the father by him verse eighteen wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands as is fit in the lord husbands love your wives and be not bitter against them children obey your parents in all things not some things but all things for this is well pleasing unto the Lord fathers provoke not your children to anger lest they be discouraged servants obey in all things your masters according to obey in all things your masters according to the flesh not with I service as men pleasers but in singleness of heart fearing God and whatsoever you do do it heartily as to the Lord and not unto men knowing that of the Lord you shall receive the reward of the inheritance for you serve the Lord Christ but he that doeth wrong shall receive for the wrong which he has done and there is no respect of persons glorifying and enjoying God and the family.

Let's pray together. Father, thank you for the reading of Holy scripture. Thank you for the power of the Bible to transform us in the hand of thy spirit. Lord, you know that what we're attempting right now is impossible. A sinful, fallible man is attempting to communicate truths that transcend him and these your people where we are.

We're often distracted and worried and anxious about a great many things. Please oh lord, cause the preacher to say those things that you would have him to say and open up our ear, our our ears and our hearing and our understanding so that we might leave this place differently from the way that we came in. We love you with all of our hearts and we give you praise and everybody in the building said Amen. Please be seated. God bless you once again.

Thank you for the privilege of sharing with you. One of the great blessings of this life is is family. God in his sovereign mercy has lovingly placed us in a household. Wonderfully scripture paints a beautiful picture of the household and indeed of household enjoyment. One of the ways that we glorify God is through our interpersonal relationships one to another when we participate in joyful and Holy households that love one another deeply and seek to honor Christ But as most of you know family life is not always this way For scripture paints a wonderful picture for us, but sometimes our personal experiences aren't so wonderful Indeed our homes are under attack up One of our other speakers talked about that.

I believe that was Brother Josh. Our homes are under attack. The devil hates this first institution that God created that we read about in Genesis chapter one and two, that God creates man in his own image after the image of God created he them male and female right he created he them and the devil hates it and has hated it from the beginning hence Genesis chapter 3 And I'll tell you that my personal experience in this is one of desperation. I remember 10, 11 years ago arriving on this mountain to hear messages concerning the fields being ripe and ripe for harvest. I remember coming here and seeing things that I had never seen before.

I was already into my pastor at some 15 years. I had a seven-year-old. I had a two-year-old and a newborn and I walked on this mountain and I went, where did all these men come from? And and and all these ladies look happy and goodness gracious Do you people have some children? Like okay, so that the command in Genesis we're taking that literally okay, I see that what we're doing right and so but I was amazed by that, but it wasn't just what I saw, it was coming out of my heart.

I was that little boy at seven years old with divorced parents in Columbia, South Carolina, who waited on Saturday mornings to see if his dad would come pick him up that day. That's how I grew up. I was that teenager after his mother remarried, and I love my stepfather. He's in heaven now with the Lord and love him with all my heart, but before he became the man that he was when he died, He was an abusive alcoholic and he hurt us. So how was that guy?

I was I was the guy who who saw his mother hit In an alcoholic rage and and we are and she's grabbing up her son her only child and running down the street to a neighbor's house because our family life certainly wasn't glorifying God. And there was very little enjoyment in it for she and I, I can tell you that. And so that's my experience coming out of divorce. That even is my wife's experience coming out of divorce. And so we're married and we have children now and we hear about church and family life through Scott Brown and and we're here and I'm desperate I'm going Lord I never want what happened to me to happen to my children as a matter of fact whatever you you you choose to use me to do to help this not be somebody else's experience, Lord, bring it on because no little boy should have to grow up like that and no little girl should have to grow up like that.

And so I just I'm telling you that to frame our discussion for me, this isn't academic, it's personal. This is this is real. This is spiritual warfare it's it's it's life and death and so this doctrine of the family that's unfolded in Scripture I grabbed it my wife grabbed it every verse every jot every tittle and we simply tried to do it because whatever God has in store for us has to be better than the way that we grew up. And so for us this is real and I chose Colossians because I know I don't have much time and Colossians just if you just took that epistle and just laid it on your household it would become immediately better And so I'm gonna take you through Colossians just very briefly and we'll spend hopefully most of our time in chapter 3 in Chapter number 1 the Apostle Paul under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit anchors this epistle and subsequently all the instruction therein in Christ which is the typical Pauline pattern that we see in his epistles and he also anchors it in this perspective that I hope to try to communicate to you called an eternal perspective which is essential in order to maintain household harmony love faith and unity in Colossians chapter 1 Paul says this in verse 3 he says we give thanks to God and the father of our Lord Jesus Christ praying always for you since we heard of your faith in Christ Jesus and of the love which ye have to all the saints for the hope which is laid up for you in heaven where of ye heard before in the word of truth of the gospel which is come unto you as it is in all the world and bringeth forth fruit as it doth also in you since the day ye heard of it and knew the grace of God in truth now when I look at scripture I know that this was not written to me, but it came through the apostle and it came through the church of Corinth to me, so it was not written directly to me, but it was given to me by the Spirit of God.

And so I read these verses and I grab them and I go, Lord, you've given me faith in you. Lord, there is hope that you've given me in you. There's a reward that's laid up in heaven. This is important because we're going somewhere with this. Lord, you've shown me the truth of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

You've saved me from my sins and my transgressions. Therefore, I can bear fruit because your word says I can in you, not in my own strength, but in you, you have shown me the grace of God in truth." Now, can you imagine, I'm going to say this a lot over the next 30 minutes, but can you Imagine a household that grabs a verse like that and anchors itself down in the truth of the grace of the gospel of Jesus Christ He says in Colossians chapter 1 verse 15. So he describes the work of Christ, but then he also describes the person of Christ He says who is the image of the invisible God the firstborn over every creature For by him were all things created that are in heaven and that are in earth, visible and invisible, whether they be thrones or dominions or principalities or powers. All things were created by him and for him. He is before all things and by him all things consist.

He is the head of the body, the church, who is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead that in all things he might have the preeminence. Indeed, this is the glorious personage of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of the living God and God the Son, who is the image of the invisible God. So Paul, as is typical of his pattern, he shows us the work of Christ in the gospel. He explains and he gives us great and vivid imagery of the person of Christ. And again, this is important before we get to the imperatives.

And so having established Christ in chapter one, in chapter two, Paul begins to encourage this church to joyfully obey Christ. Now, this is important because in the age in which we live, and I think you've heard this already a couple of times in this conference, reading the Bible is one thing, obeying the Bible is another thing. And if we don't have the proper motivation, as Brother Josh said, to obey the scriptures, it becomes just legalism. But the motivation is that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures, that he was buried and that he rose again on the third day according to the scriptures and as we get to the section on family and begin to talk about some of these things that aren't very popular in the world today friends remember who died for your sins who is buried and who rose again on the third day. Having established Christ again in chapter one and chapter two, Paul switches just a little bit.

He goes back and forth a bit in Colossians, but he gives us this wonderful transition to obey. He says in chapter two, verse six, and as ye have therefore received Christ Jesus as Lord Having understood Christ having having repented and believed in Christ having some Crystallological knowledge, you know who he is, you know what he's done, you know how much he loved you there is the heat there is hope in Jesus and and then when you put your confidence and your trust and your faith in Jesus having done all of these things he says so walk ye in him rooted and built up in him and established in the faith as ye have been taught abounding therein with thanksgiving We ought to joyfully obey everything that God has given us. Right. Why? Because Jesus is such a great savior.

And we are such great sinners, but he died for me. He was buried and he rose again. He did for me what I cannot do for myself. And so when he gives me commands as it relates to work or when he gives me commands as it relates to church or when he gives me commands as it relates to glorifying and understanding him or when he gives me commands as a man Or as a husband or as a wife or as a mother we joyfully Joyfully root ourselves down in those things and abound in them with Thanksgiving Beware he says in verse 8 lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit. In other words, obey Christ and stop listening to the world.

This is really important when it comes to the doctrine of the family, because how many of you would agree with me that there's a lot of talk about family out there, and the world is busily recreating family in its own image. But God's word describes for us what family life should be like. It unfolds this beautiful doctrine of the family, and so we don't wanna listen to philosophies and vain deceits. We don't wanna listen to the traditions of men, and the traditions of men might even be your family, right? I mean there were some traditions in my family that my wife and I said hey, we love you mom dad We love you grandparents, but we're not doing that.

We love you, but we're not doing that Right because what we want what we desperately want is a household that looks like, that sounds like Dr. Beekie said, that smells like Jesus. And so we don't want the rudiments of the world and not after Christ, for in Christ dwelleth the fullness of the godhead bodily and ye are complete in him I tell you families as we get into this Everything you need to figure out family is in God's Word. It's all in Christ. You don't need anything else You need to go anyplace else.

You don't need a magazine You don't need All you need is your Bible and a willing heart to hear and obey God in Christ is the head of all principality and power. So here's my proposition for you again Just really quickly going through Colossians. It's a lot and I got to get to these other verses But my proposition for you simply this joyful obedience brings glory to God and increased household enjoyment but on the contrary disobedience to God's commands or grumbling about them doesn't glorify God at all and Somehow we can we can say amen and enjoy the great and weighty doctrines and the heady doctrines of the glory of God as we wrestle with and try to understand his magnanimity, his power, his glory, his honor. And we get there and we do that pretty good And then when he gets down to honor your parents, we struggle. And this epistle brings us all the way from he is the image of the invisible God to, hey, husband, love your wife.

And that's what we need. We need the former right? We need that beginning We need to stay anchored in Jesus so that we have the strength to build out our households according to the Word of God Again, the motive for this proposition the motive for this obedience is Christ and his victorious work he says in in Colossians 2 13 and you being dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your flesh hath he quickened together with him having forgiven you all trespasses Blotting out the handwriting of ordinances that was against us which was contrary to us and took it out of the way Hallelujah nailing it to the cross I believe I can be a good husband if I can figure that out and having spoiled principalities and powers He made a show of them openly triumphing over them in it. I believe, mom, dad, brother, sister, sibling, there's power in the gospel for you to build a household according to God's word. As I think sometimes we can be a little academic and this has already been said and and forget that there is power power wonder working power in the blood of the lamb and so after warning against legalism and false worship in the closing verses of chapter 2.

Paul exhorts the church in chapter 3 in holiness and in the Christian life. These attributes and characteristics are the results of gospel transformation that we read about in chapter 1 and 2 of the new birth. They're the results of salvation and they apply to the local church which is the context but the local church is filled with families and so as we as we read this epistle that was that was given to us through the Apostle Paul through the church at Colossae then we take them and we make them ours and we make them personal. For example, if you look at the opening verses in the first few verses of chapter number three, again, as I said at the outset, you can take this epistle and just overlay it on a household and come out the other side, you know, 90% of the way to just a wonderful a wonderful a biblical a Joyful a happy home. For example, if you look at verse 1 of chapter 3 and I'll bring it into the family context Can you imagine family members?

That spent all their time seeking the risen Christ and seeking heavenly things where Christ is. In other words, they have a heavenly or an eternal perspective. Can you imagine family members whose affections, whose minds, whose hearts are set on heavenly things? That'll fix an argument really quickly. Perhaps not even have an argument when you when you're so busy seeking Christ and you're so busy thinking about heavenly things I mean yeah Johnny stole my toy but I love Jesus so he can have it who says that family members who know that they are dead to this life and who are alive in Jesus Christ would that that would be a wonderful way to kind of let a slight you know go without a whole without retribution or a whole a whole big to do about it he's I'm already dead it's okay I mean I sin to it's all right Family members who declare Christ is our life from verse number four, this is what we do, this is who we are, Jesus is our very existence.

Family members who are confident in Christ's return and their being with him in glory also in verse number four. Family members with a mind to mortify their fleshly members and kill sin as we read in verse number five. Family members who fear God and who warn others of the wrath to come in verse six family members who are grateful for God's deliverance from their past lives and they're willing to testify about it in verse seven family members who are continually putting off anger and wrath and malice and blasphemy and filthy communication not in our household we serve Jesus here he's our very life We're not going to tell that joke. We're not going to blaspheme God. We're not going to walk in unbiblical anger.

We're not going to stay angry with one another when the sun goes down. But we're quick to repent and quick to reconcile. Family members who refuse to lie to one another as that is characteristic of the old man in verse nine of chapter three family members who are new and renewed in their knowledge of the creator and indeed They strive after that each and every day as they open the scriptures family members Who understand? And have a biblical ethic concerning social distinctions. We read that in chapter 11 in other words We love everybody and we're grateful for our ethnicities in our family Family members who know and live like God's elect.

We know we've been chosen by God and we're so overwhelmed that we we worship him. Family members can in Jesus forbear and forgive one another. We read that in verse 13. We don't have time to read it but if please do again you could just take this chapter and your family can just turn around. They can be by God's power this family that we're describing clothed and united in love and charity in verse 14.

And these These kinds of folks are more consistently ruled by God's peace and they desire to work towards unity in their in their family with thankfulness in verse in verse number 15. That leads us to our text. All these wonderful truths and perspectives are maintained by the rich and indwelling power of the word of Christ in us. Again, as we look, Remember that verse, the word of God should dwell in us richly and we should, we should read it and we should sing it and we should do family worship and we should do all of these things because without the word of God consistently, we cannot understand consistently and walk in the blessings of the doctrine of the family. The word richly means abundant in verse number 16.

It not only suggests Christ's word is abundant in and of itself, but also that such a word should abundantly dwell in us. So the word is rich and that rich word should be on the inside of us. Again, reading it and singing it and studying it and memorizing it. Our lives should be characterized by a fullness of and obedience to Holy Scripture in a day where even many professing Christians fight against the clear commands of the master, the master's words should be our joy. Typically when something is good and richly present we rejoice and we should both again read it and sing it if we're rejoicing and I'm getting to I'm going somewhere with this but if we're reading it and if we're singing it, then we should probably just go ahead and obey it.

And I'm convinced when it comes to the family, I'm convinced that there's a lot of nodding and yeah, it says that, but it doesn't really mean that going on. I'm convinced when it comes to this doctrine similar to the doctrine of the church I mean we all kind of know you know Hebrews tells us that we should not forsake the assembling but yeah I mean we get it we'll go we'll be there next Sunday it's okay and so we take it really lightly. It's like that with the family often particularly with the way the world is pressing in on the church concerning what's appropriate and what's not in a household. Paul's next statement in verse 17 provides a holy governance for all of life. All that we do, all that we say we should do in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ is isn't that a wonderful way to live?

Can you say that that's how you treat your wife? That's how you treat your husband? You do these things. You address them, you know, so that Jesus is pleased with it. And this is really the anchor.

I mean, we don't have time to go to Genesis one and two and read it and we don't have time to look at Deuteronomy. We don't have time but if you if you just again overlay on your family that whatever we do here our aim is to please God. You will walk your way by the grace of God into a household that looks like scripture. This is the perspective that we need. Are you still with me?

All right, so that's now that we've kind of laid a little bit of a foundation. Let's look at everybody's most popular verse here, similar to Ephesians 5. Let's look at Colossians 3 and verse 18. And as Paul, having anchored down the epistle in Jesus having encouraged their obedience and encouraged him to be rooted and grounded and all these things he gets very specific very quickly verse 18 one more time says this wives submit yourself unto your own husbands as is fit in the Lord and then Verse 19 husbands love your wives and do not be bitter against them and we'll talk about that Here's counsel and command to children obey your parents in all things Didn't and I said earlier didn't say some things And you guys acted like you didn't hear that verse verse 21 fathers provoked not your children to anger lest it be discouraged Some counsel there and then do those last verses apply to family at all We'll talk about that and so why it's any how many wives wave at me wives good, okay? You guys so tired you can't even put your hand in the air.

All right. Why submit yourself to your own husband? We read about this in a couple different places and Ephesians often comes to mind. The phrase submit yourself, a hupostaso or hupotaso in Greek means to be subordinate or be in subjection. I know I'm making friends and influence people right now.

Uh this same word by the way, so to be subordinate to come under, right? And this same word is used in Titus chapter two verse five to be discreet chase keepers at home good obedient who potaso obedient to their own husbands that the Word of God be not blasphemed it is characteristic of the doctrine of the family that the wife in the family again God created the male and female he created this institution not male male and female female but male and female as a matter of fact in my church I just have everybody say male and female ready set go male and female right that's we have to do that in in 2023 but it's characteristic of a woman who loves God that she submits herself or she Subordinates herself or she comes under the authority of her husband and indeed She is commanded to walk in submission to her husband This is where my man right there would go, amen! All right. Listen, how much courage does it take in 2023 to live this way? Hey, you wanna have a family that looks like the Bible?

You wanna unfold the doctrine of the family? Well, it's more than a four bedroom, two and a half bath with a white picket fence. It's people who said, this is how God designed us to live. This is how he wants us to live. And so how much courage, ladies, does it take to live this way as wives today to take your husband's vision as your own, to submit to him as unto the Lord?

We're not talking doormat here. You all know that we're talking about order in the home What fears and obstacles must you overcome to live this way? And yet the perspective that Paul has laid out in this letter the person of Christ the authority and dominion of Christ the work of Christ the obedience towards Christ is to command frame these other Commandments for us A wife submits herself to her husband not because he's worthy, but because Christ is. He's a sinner saved only by grace and I speak for all the husbands and we make tons of mistakes all the husbands That's a good place to say. Amen I'm marvel at my wife who could follow a guy like me who makes so many errors so many mistakes But She does it particularly in those moments where I'm not doing too Well as unto the Lord and she gives me that as unto the Lord looked like oh, I'll do it But that's because I love Jesus.

All right Okay sisters God is Glorified This conference is about the glory of God. It's about glorifying God and enjoying him forever. And our subject is the family sisters. God is glorified when you submit yourself to your husband as unto the Lord. He is glorified when you're a happy submitter.

Guess I won't be back next year, Scott. Joyfully submissive wives are better able to enjoy their God because they're not walking in rebellion. Indeed, they are happy to surrender themselves to the plan of Almighty God because his plan for them is best and all his pathways are peace and such obedience beings brings blessing into the household. But he didn't let the men off the hook in verse 19 husbands are exhorted next husbands are commanded to love their wives and Be not bitter against them many are familiar with the love word here. I got payo command for husbands It is a self sacrificing kind of love that was preeminently modeled by Jesus himself.

To Ephesus Paul wrote, husbands love your wives even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word that he might present it to himself, a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that it should be holy and without blemish. The great privilege of a husband is to love her as Christ loves the church to give his time to give his provision to give his attention to to give his care you know I saw something on Twitter I think it was today maybe this morning or yesterday where Someone had tweeted that a husband's not responsible for his wife's emotional needs, and I think it was well-intended, but I'm going, yep, okay, but aren't I to dwell with her with understanding? And if she's hurting, shouldn't I do everything within my power? I mean, I may not fully understand it, but I can at least say, hey, I love you. I don't know exactly what you're going through, but I'm here for you.

This is the great privilege of a Christian husband. He knows that his wife is in a position that's contrary to the way the world walks, and so he's gentle with her. He's tender with her. He goes out of his way to make sure that she's provided for and cared for. Well, what's this command about bitterness?

How'd that get in there? What's that about? That distinguishes this a little bit from what we read over in Ephesians. This word for bitter means not only to be angry, but to be exasperated, to be irritated. And this can result in grudge holding and harsh treatment.

And some of you may may ask, but why? Why would a godly man who loves the Lord be bitter against his his husband? Well, bitterness often rises when one party feels taken advantage of. And ironically, the very things that we men prize, our headship and our provision, those are the kinds of things, because of the responsibility thereof, can also turn us into bitter husbands. You know, I can't, I mean, pastor, she just keeps asking me for stuff.

Well, yeah. Who else is she gonna ask? Well, she needs help with the children all the time. Yeah. You know, this thing over here keeps breaking and every time I turn around I have to write, I make it and it goes out the door.

Yeah, bro, that's what you do, right? And that's the whole point, that's what you do. And so this bitterness thing, it really can jump on you. So this is in here for a reason. The connotation is this, husbands might give and sacrifice much, but still be resentful and disgruntled in the doing much courage is needed not only to do good man things but to be a good man a strong masculine man again is still gentle with his weaker vessel and quickly forgives her and again goes out of his way to make sure that she has what she needs he does not resent his service to her but rather Rather he rejoices in it and so again the perspective I mean that might be a tall order men to not only serve her and provide for her and be a priest over her and a prophet in her household might be like, it might seem like a tall order, but the same instruction that were given to the wives or given to the husbands, the same framing, the same foundation Paul lays out again, the person of Christ, the authority and dominion of Christ, the work of Christ, the obedience Towards Christ that frame those commands also framed this one that frames the command to the wife Also frames the command to the husband and so brothers if you want to build a godly household and enjoy God in the building know this God is glorified by loving and patient husbands.

Such husbands are able to better enjoy god because they are not walking in rebellion against their creator but they are gentle with their wives. I believe in biblical headship, but you really want to irritate me? Be a harsh husband to your wife. That's when I want I want to grab another elder and take you behind a woodshed, bro. Your strength is there, and I'm this is coming from a guy that grew up in a household where there was abuse your strength is there to cover her and protect her not Lord over her or intimidate her don't you ever do it and if you have done it repent today children are exhorted in verse 20 children are commanded to obey their parents and all things to all the the young ones to the boys and girls to the teenagers to those living in their parents household.

This will take great courage in 2023. Dishonor and disrespect are common today. Rebellion is the cool thing. In fact, for a teen or for a child in 2023 to truly reverence their parents, I believe it'll take great faith. It'll take great faith in who our Lord is and what our Lord has done, Particularly if you are commonly exposed to the carnal thinking of our day whether that's through media Or music maybe in this room not so much schooling, but you never know We teach our church that as it relates to the household honor is the glue that holds everything together It is the grease that causes things to run smoothly and the guard and the guard rails for when things get testy with honor in the household.

A household is a wonderful place to be without honor in the household. There's disrespect. There's distrust. There's disorder. It's simply chaos and I think it's it's on purpose that when we look in the Bible, you would think there will be many scriptures that command children to love their parents.

Well, it's implied and for example, in in Matthew 1037, it's implied that you know, if you love father or mother more than me, Jesus says, you're not worthy of me. So, we it's implied but when you look for direct didactic commands in the Bible that children love your parents, you you don't find much. What you find is children obey your parents in the lord for this is right. Honor thy father and mother which is the first commandment with promise that it may be well with thee and thou mayest live long on the earth Ephesians chapter one versus one chapter six verses one through three And it's not that God doesn't want children to love their parents He most certainly does but it's these often with with us in our younger years. It's the outgrowth of that love.

That's the issue Children can say I love you mom and dad all day But coming to school time joyfully is a different thing altogether Okay, and so young ones boys and girls honor your parents right Honor your father and mother which means that you obey them in the lord and and your your facial expressions count. Amen. Parents, right? Your facial expression tell us exactly what's going on in your heart. So sadly, many children miss out, and many families miss out on the good things that honor brings.

But it brings household blessing. And again, if that sounds hard, you just don't know my mother. You just don't know my father. You just don't know my situation. You know, my mother's never had my mother.

I can't ever please her. I can't ever please my dad. You just don't understand. I may not, but here's here's the thing that I know that Jesus is lord and lord of all that he died for your sins. Remember, Paul anchors all of these commands in the person of Christ, the authority and dominion of Christ, the work of Christ, and commands us to be obedient to Christ because of it.

Children, God is glorified by parent honoring postures when you honor them in all things. I encourage you to walk in holy boldness and resolve to keep your father's commandment and forsake not the law of your mother. To just say yes ma'am and yes sir with a joyful heart. It'll bless you and it'll bless them and the side benefit is and you'll live longer and more well on the earth. Amen.

Paul then addresses fathers in verse Twenty-one. Fathers are commanded not to provoke or intentionally aggravate their children, lest they become discouraged. Instead, they are told to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Ephesians 6 four. Scripture is filled with positive commands for parents to train their children in the way that they should go, that when they are old, they won't depart from it.

Scripture says, and thou shall teach them diligently into the children and thou shall talk of them without citizen, thine house. And when they walk us by the way and when thou lies down and when thou rises up Deuteronomy six, seven. But the command not to provoke is also here for a reason. Let's be honest with one another. How easy is it in our parenting to be overly harsh with our children and Unnecessarily discourage them.

It's very easy How easy is it to parent with lots of correction and very little outward displays of love? This is again was brought up just yesterday but it bears repeating. We are in an environment where we believe in child discipline and we believe in correction and quick correction and quick obedience but just as we believe in that I sure hope you're hugging them good. I sure hope you're taking walks with them. I sure hope you're giving them a hug and a kiss and let them know mommy and daddy really loves them and you're so glad that God sent them to you.

I certainly hope that's that's going on. I mean so you again you could have the perfectly behaved a role of perfectly behaved children who are scared to death of you and not in a good way. Not the fear of the Lord kind of fear. But oh, my Lord, I don't really think my parents love me. All they really want me to do is just sit still.

I hope that's not going on, because that's not the doctrine of the family, and that's not they're not enjoying God through your parenting with that going on. And so that command is there for a reason. God is glorified when those to whom he is granted the stewardship of living souls trust and obey him as they bring up those same souls in the faith. And I have to move a little quicker here because that is a really big clock back there. Verse 22, does it have any applicability at all for households?

I think it does, especially as we train up our children to be productive and Pastor Jason handled that so I'll skip that a little bit but I'll simply say for the sake of time but I'll simply say in our households let's train our children to be the most punctual the most prepared for the day the most joyful with the best countenance the most respectful to customers and employers the most honest with impeccable integrity the first to make peace and repent for wrongdoing, the most helpful, the most respectful, and the most generous with their time. Let's go to verse 23. I'll read it one more time. Verse 23 says, and whatsoever you do, do it heartily as to the Lord and not unto and not unto men Yes, this applies to our economic endeavors without a doubt but Could our family life be blessed by this mindset, particularly after hearing of the primary posture of a wife and the primary posture of a husband and the primary posture of a parent and the primary posture of a child? Those things are daunting, they're tough, particularly when there's been offense and maybe everybody's just, and I hadn't gotten together.

I know some of you are here the first time you go and submit to my husband this dude is crazy, right? How you do all this can this mindset be be blessed or can this mindset help us be blessed? I believe it can for example wives when you realize that all you do you do unto the glory of God and you should do it heartily unto God's glory. Wives, when you're submitting yourself heartily unto your husbands as to the Lord or are you I should say and are you submitting to him with joy are you submitting to him with enthusiasm in other words Have you just refused to allow any authority fights in the house? Are you are you doing it with intentionality?

Are you looking them lovingly in the eyes and saying I just love submitting to you Husbands, are you loving your wife? I got like a ooh and a ah there husbands Are you I know I get it husbands are you loving your wife as unto the Lord, placing her above yourself, sacrificing for her? In other words, are you loving her with gusto, man? Are you laying your life down on a daily basis? Are you dwelling with her with understanding and giving her honor as unto the weaker vessel?

Is it intentional? Are you thinking about it? Are you praying about it? Children, are you obeying your parents with a hearty obedience you jump out of bed in the morning and go mom and dad what do you want me to do today I'm standing by Are you making your room with gladness and coming into school time with singing? Oh And having heard all of that, you know, is there anyone who like me who's I got a little repenting to do today Yeah, well look I'm out of time but as we close this out, there's so much more but the bottom line is first of all, get Jesus Christ.

Know him, love him, understand him, repent, and believe in the gospel and then whatever he says to you concerning family, know it's for your good. Paul encourages an eternal perspective in verse number 24. He's going somewhere with this. It's all going to be worth it. He reminds the church of the proper motive.

It's going to be an eternal war with Jesus Christ. In other words, all these things, as difficult as they may be at times, it will be worth it. Obedience is worth it. He's not saying we're saved by works. He's reminding the church that their obedience is worth it.

And finally, verse twenty five, we'll give an account one day. Well, again, this is often interpreted to just you know deal with matters of Employment and so forth. Is there a way that we can look at this though in a broader con in the broader context of chapter 3 well you be a good Berean and you and you figure that out but I'll say this do you think a husband has to will be held accountable for how he treats his wife and do you think a wife will be held accountable for how she treats her Do you think parents will be held accountable for how they treat their children? Matthew 12 and verse 36 says, but I say unto you that every idle word that men shall speak they shall give an account thereof in the day of judgment. So I'll put that before you to see if verse 25 has applicability, but I actually think it does.

Finally, it takes faith and commitment to obey scripture and to walk consistently in the blessings of God as it relates to family. We just tapped the very surface of it today, but it has to be built on the rock of Jesus Christ. Beloved, know that the world will mock you in this the devil works hard against all these things he'll try to make it all seem crazy but this is the heart and the plan of God he wants you to have sweet and joyful and beautiful homes as Paul finishes up his letter to the church of Colossae he says this in chapter 4 verse 2 he says Continue in prayer and watch the same with Thanksgiving. In verse five of chapter four, he says, walk in wisdom toward them that are without redeeming the time. And in verse six, he says, Let your speech be all way with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how to answer every man.

Yes, that's great counsel for the church. Does it applaud a family? Well, I give you this. Pray for your household. Pray for its members individually.

Call out your children's names and do so with thanksgiving. Search the scriptures to acquire wisdom that you might relate to them well, redeeming the time. Don't stay mad forever. You'll never get that hour of Cold War back again. Don't waste a moment.

Redeem the time. And know this, if there's any group of people with whom You should watch your talk and tone. It's your household. It's your family. It's your wife.

It's your husband. Season up your speech with good salt and your countenance as well with biblical salt. Pray before you speak maybe more often and edify and administer grace to one another in your households. To those of you who are at this conference and things aren't as they appear, maybe you're really struggling, I urge you to humble yourself, repent quickly and forgive quickly. You'll never get this time back.

A shoe-grudge holding and scorekeeping, and again, redeem the time. And for those of you who might be here and you're really struggling you're really hurting you're really in trouble there's some ungodly things happening in your household I beg you to seek your elders out for biblical counsel and if you don't have a church talk with the leaders here at Church and Family Life so that we can help you get it get biblical counsel fast and pray. In the meantime, remember that with God, all things are possible. Oh, Pastor, is it possible for me to have the house that you're describing filled with all this love and joy and obedience and submission and blessing. It most certainly is, my friend.

It most certainly is because you serve a great savior. May the Lord strengthen your home for his glory. Let's pray together. Father, thank you for the honor to stand before your people just for a few moments today and just scratched the surface of unfolding the doctrine of the family. It was your idea to create Adam and out of his out of his side take a rib and create a suitable helper for him whom Adam named Eve.

You did that. You created the first family. The institution of the household is yours. It was your idea and from then till now you've allowed us to live in households and in families and your word speaks so clearly to how they could be sweet and blessed and joyful and the orders that you give us the commands that you give us they they great against our flesh and they great against the world and the devil hates them but therefore our good and they create this environment where you are glorified in our joy. Our enjoyment of you increases through our families.

Do that in this room, Lord. Do it more and more for thy glory alone. Amen.