In his sermon titled 'What You Should Be, What You Should Do,' Jason Dohm emphasizes the importance of having a vibrant spiritual life and mature Christian character as key preparations for marriage. He argues that one's primary focus should be on walking closely with Jesus and conforming to His image. Dohm uses Philippians 3:3-7 to illustrate how Paul considered his past achievements as loss compared to the surpassing worth of knowing Christ. Paul’s example underscores that confidence in the flesh is futile, and true righteousness comes through faith in Jesus. Dohm also highlights the difference between union with Christ and communion with Christ, urging believers to strive for deeper fellowship with Jesus. Addressing young people and singles, he encourages them to be examples in their conduct and to pursue spiritual growth without waiting for a different stage of life. Singleness, he argues, offers a unique opportunity to serve the Lord without distraction and should be seen as an advantage rather than a hindrance.

I always think it's very dramatic when the preacher takes forever to get ready. You know, it sort of heightens anticipation. The title of my message this morning is, What You Should Be, what you should do. I'm going to tell you from the word of God what you ought to be and from the word of God what you ought to do. Here's something said repeatedly by Scott about preparing for marriage.

If you came here last year, you heard this a bunch of times. Stop preparing for marriage. Start walking closely with Jesus so that you begin to become more conformed to his image and as that happens, you'll begin to find that you're prepared for marriage. Here's another way to say that. A vibrant spiritual life and mature Christian character are what you need in marriage.

A vibrant spiritual life and mature Christian character are what wives need from husband, from their husband. A vibrant spiritual life and mature Christian character are what husbands need from their wives. So rigorous discipleship is preparation for marriage. Does that mean there are no practical categories that need attention in order to be ready for marriage? No, there are.

We could list them. But mature Christian character will help you in all of those categories. And those categories are secondary anyway. In other words, if I get those practical categories in order, but I'm not walking with close, not walking closely with Jesus, and therefore I have little conformity to his image. I'm still not ready to be married.

But if I'm walking closely with Jesus, and therefore I'm becoming increasingly conformed to his image, that will have a profound effect even on those practical categories. So, we're, I'm not going to spend time on the practical categories. I'm going to zoom out and talk about vigorous spiritual life and mature Christian character. Let's ask God to help us. God, we've come and gone from messages before many times.

All of us have been unmoved, unchanged. God, please spare us from that today in the messages that are preached until we go to bed tonight. Spare us from that. Please cause your Spirit to be moving mightily in the hearts of your people to cause your Word to take root and to move us and to change us. I pray that would be the outcome of our time.

May it be so in Jesus' name. Amen. Okay, number one, what you should be, please turn your Bibles to Philippians chapter three. What you should be. My text now is Philippians 3 verses 3 through 7, well-worn ground but also still very profitable, even though it's well-worn.

Philippians chapter 3, I'll be reading verses 3 through 7, follow along as I read. The apostle Paul writes to the Philippians, for we are the circumcision who worship God in the Spirit, rejoice in Christ Jesus, and have no confidence in the flesh. Though I also might have confidence in the flesh. If anyone else thinks he may have confidence in the flesh, I more so. Circumcised the eighth day of the stock of Israel of the tribe of Benjamin a Hebrew of the Hebrews concerning the law of Pharisee concerning zeal persecuting the church concerning the righteousness which is in the law blameless But what things were gained to me, these I have counted loss for Christ.

Yet indeed I also count all things lost for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my lord for whom I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish That I may gain Christ and be found in him Not having my own righteousness which is from the law but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which is from God by faith, that I may know him and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of his sufferings being conformed to his death, if by any means I may attain to the resurrection from the dead. Who is Paul? Paul is a man who isn't straddling. He is a decided single-minded follower of Jesus Christ, not a man with a foot in each world. He isn't trying to serve two masters, he isn't faltering between two opinions.

He knows what he values and he knows what he wants. He wants Jesus. Let's go to the text. At the beginning of our text, Paul lays out his resume. He gives us his resume and then he rips it up, tears it up.

He counts it lost, considers it rubbish, puts it on the trash heap. Here is my observation about Paul's resume. It's way better than my resume. I like his resume. In other words, if we needed confidence in the flesh, if we were just comparing ourselves among ourselves, I would want to trade my resume for Paul's resume.

I would stack up better in the comparison of myself among ourselves better if I could trade him. But Paul says confidence in his resume would fail. So I can know confidence in my resume would fail because I want to trade him. So I need something to hope in outside of myself that won't fail. Paul tells us what that is, faith in Christ.

Believing in Jesus, trusting in Jesus. Confidence in the flesh fails no matter your resume, Your own righteousness, which is from the law, fails. It's fine as long as we're comparing ourselves among ourselves, but when we begin to compare ourselves to God, who is perfectly good and perfectly true, it fails. It must fail. Faith in Christ never fails because the object of faith is Jesus and he is perfectly good and perfectly true and faith acquires an interest for me in his perfect goodness and perfect truth.

Now, Notice this, the things that once supported his confidence, and he now calls that a worthless confidence, he counts as loss. Paul writes it off on the ledger. So he has a ledger of assets and a ledger of liabilities. He said, all that is liabilities. All of that is loss.

He writes it off of his ledger. None of those things that once supported his confidence are bad things. Look back through the list. The things that once provided him confidence in the flesh, none of those are bad things in and of themselves. A good family line, is that a bad thing?

No, it's a good thing. A carefully maintained and even zealous religion. A scrupulously kept morality to the point of blamelessness, meaning that if you were an onlooker on his life, you wouldn't be able to find things to blame him and say you don't have an outward conformity to the righteousness of the law. Paul isn't saying, I escaped my wild days of pot smoking and womanizing when I found Jesus. Paul is saying, I went as far as carefully maintained, zealous religion and scrupulous morality can take a person.

I went to the outer limits of where carefully maintained religion and scrupulous morality can take you. And I found that they are nothing. Now, before you think that I've become an antinomian, become the anti-law guy, and that I no longer think that religious practice and moral living matter, understand that I'm just trying to say what Paul is saying in Philippians 3, nothing more, nothing less, until faith in Jesus is at the heart of religious practice and moral living. They are worthless to me. They count for nothing.

They are a worthless confidence. They are a hope destined to fail. I must have something more than that. I think it could go without saying that Paul was deeply committed to religious practice and moral living after his conversion. Does anyone want to debate that point?

After his conversion, was Paul deeply committed to religious practice? Of course he was. Was he deeply committed to moral living after conversion? Of course he was, but he looked back on both of those things in his pre-conversion life and said, worthless. Now, a question.

What would Paul totally walk away from such a strong resume according to normal human reckoning in exchange for. What was he trading for? He had a good resume according to the flesh. What would he trade that in for? Verse eight, the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus, his Lord.

The excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus, his Lord. The New American Standard renders it this way. The surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus. There is a new and enduring value judgment for Paul. It's new, it didn't exist before.

It's enduring, it'll last through eternity for Paul. A new and enduring value judgment. Paul says, the things that I used to value, rubbish. Knowing Jesus, surpassing worth. The things that I used to value, nothing.

Knowing Jesus, everything. This is how Jesus himself described it in Matthew 13 verses 45 and 46. Just listen to what Jesus says in Matthew 13 verses 45 and 46 says again the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking beautiful pearls who when he had found one pearl of great price one pearl of great price went and sold all that he had and bought it. Surpassing worth. This is a pearl merchant.

He trades in things of value and he's bought pearls and sold pearls. But then one day he sees one and he'll trade everything for it. Not to buy it and sell it, but to buy it and have it forever he would never part with it because he knows the values of pearls and so one day when he sees this pearl he must have it he'll give everything for it friends It is worth anything to gain Christ. It is worth everything to gain Christ. Two comments I think should be made at this point.

Comment number one. Away with the thought that you can have a new life with Jesus without walking away from your old life. Just banish that thought. I don't have to walk away from the old life. I'll just add Jesus.

Listen to what Jesus himself says, not to the 12 disciples, but to the multitudes who are hearing him in Luke 14. Turn there if you like. I'll be reading Luke 14 verses 25 through 30. So I mean you have to get the first part of this right. This is not Jesus with his 12 disciples.

This is Jesus addressing the multitudes. Jesus addressing everyone. This is not for a special subgroup. It's for every the multitudes that are listening to him preach. Luke 14 verses 25 through 30.

Now great multitudes went with him and he, Jesus, turned and said to them, the great multitudes, If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple. And whoever does not bear his cross and come after me cannot be my disciple. For which of you intending to build a tower does not sit down first and count the cost, whether he has enough to finish it. Lest after he has laid the foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him saying, This man began to build and was not able to finish. That's just what Paul is saying in Philippians 3.

Surpassing worth. You have a mother and father, Jesus must have surpassing worth to you. Way beyond the worth of your mother and father. You have a wife and children. Jesus must have surpassing worth to you way beyond your wife and children.

You have brothers and sisters. Jesus must have surpassing worth to you way beyond your brothers and sisters. You value your life. Jesus must have surpassing worth way beyond how you value your life. Other affections must be at such a distance from your affection for Jesus.

That those other affections seem to be hatred by comparison. Other allegiances must be at such a distance from your allegiance to Jesus that the other allegiances seem to be hatred by comparison. Friends, this isn't super Christianity. This is simply biblical Christianity. The New Testament doesn't know about another kind of Christianity.

I wonder if it sounds like super Christianity because we've forgotten the radical claims of the gospel and we have lost sight of or never seen the surpassing worth of Jesus Christ. Is that what makes this super Christianity to us another brand of radical Christianity when we read it? Because we've lost sight of or never seen the surpassing worth of Jesus Christ. That's comment number one, away with the thought that you can have a new life with Jesus without walking away from your old life. Comment number two, knowing Jesus is much more than completing a class on the New Testament at your local seminary.

That is knowing about Jesus. It's good to know about Jesus, but it's not the same as knowing Jesus. Those of you who know me know that my favorite author outside scripture is J.C. Ryle. Have a quote here from J.C.

Ryle from his third best book, Practical Religion. Ask me what the top two are later. And it's a fantastic book. If this was your third best book, you're an awesome author. J.C.

Rao says this. Let me ask whether we know anything of living the life of habitual communion with Christ. Let it be distinctly understood that union with Christ is one thing and communion is another. There could be no communion with the Lord Jesus without union first, but unhappily there may be union with the Lord Jesus and afterwards little or no communion at all. Union is the common privilege of all who feel their sins and truly repent and come to Christ by faith and are accepted, forgiven, and justified in Him.

Too many believers it may be feared never get beyond this stage. Partly from ignorance, partly from laziness, partliness from fear of man, partly from secret love of the world, partly from some un-mortified besetting sin. They are content with a little faith and a little hope and a little peace and a little measure of holiness. They live on all their lives in this condition, doubting, weak, halting, and bearing fruit only 30 fold to the end of their days. Here he's referencing the parable of the soils where the true believers in the story bear 30 fold or 60 fold or 100 fold.

So he's saying they bear the least fruit. Ryle concludes saying this. Communion with Christ is the privilege of those who are continually striving to grow in grace and faith and knowledge and conformity to the mind of Christ in all things. Union is the bud, but communion is the flower. Union is the babe, but communion is the strong man.

He that has union with Christ does well, but he that enjoys communion with him does far better. Union is to be had, you cannot be saved without it. Communion is to be enjoyed. Those who communion with Christ know the sweetness of it and will pay any price for it. I hope to stir you up.

I hope to stir up within you a holy discontentment in little today. If I can. If I can do that, I want to do that. To stir up within you a holy discontentment. You might have walked in here content with little.

You don't have to have little. We can have as much as we want. Ours for the asking, ours for the taking. Jesus offers himself freely. You can know him.

Not just about him, but know him. No communion with him. Know the sweetness of fellowship with him. He is alive. He is real you can know him Why be content with little?

This is the intersection of being and doing, of what you should be and what you should do. You must be the person who sees the surpassing worth of Jesus Christ and casts all of your hopes on him and walks away from the things that you used to value in your pre-conversion past to live as a decided single-minded follower of Jesus Christ. That's what Paul did. That is not just for apostles. And then out of that union with Christ, you must cultivate communion with Jesus.

Paul hungered and thirsted to know Jesus And to experience his resurrection power and even to walk with Jesus in fellowship with his sufferings. Why would Paul say, I want to walk with him even in fellowship with his sufferings because sometimes we grow the most in knowing Jesus when he brings us into hardship and suffering. Sometimes we know him little when there's plenty in prosperity. And to know him more, we have to have those things stripped away so that we can find out that Jesus satisfies the soul, even in hardship. We get fresh views of his surpassing worth when he brings us into hardship and suffering.

That's true. Paul had personally experienced this and he didn't want less of it. Oh God, give me less hardship and suffering. Give me more, plenty prosperity." No, no, no. He wanted more of the hardship and suffering because his experience was, the more hardship and suffering that I get, the more I know Christ, experience Christ, find that He satisfies my soul even in the storm.

Number two, what you should do. I turn to 1 Timothy 4 12. What you should do. A single verse that Paul writes to a Paul writes to a young single man. So we think.

First Timothy 4 verse 12. Paul writes to Timothy, let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity. This is a much shorter passage, just one verse, so my comments will be much shorter. Here's the summary. Do not let your age and your stage of life allow you to think that it's okay to lag behind.

I'm behind in age, I'm behind in stage of life, so it's okay to lag behind. I can be behind in Christian growth. Do what you can to get out front, regardless of your age and stage of life, maybe even in spite of your age and stage of life. By get out front, I obviously don't mean take charge and dominate, You know that's not what I'm saying, though there may be appropriate opportunities for you to take charge. I mean be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity.

It is frustrating to me, it is frustrating to every pastor How many young single people are postponing going for it spiritually? For heaven only knows what until heaven only knows when. No, now is the time! Now, tomorrow is the devil's day. The devil would have you go for it spiritually tomorrow, just not today because he knows how that game is played.

He knows how a lack of urgency snuffs it out. You don't have tomorrow. You only have today. Now is the day to go for it spiritually. Pursue Christ in Scripture and in prayer.

Pursue Christ in your relationships. Some of them draw you near to Christ. Some of them harm knowing Christ. Pursue Christ in your engagement with local church life. It's possible to get much more out of your engagement with local church life or much less depending on how you engage it.

Pursue Christ in it. Grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. That's how Peter says it at the end of 2 Peter. Grow in the grace. You want to grow in grace.

Grow in the knowledge. Don't you want to grow in knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Go for it! What are you waiting for? Tomorrow?

The devil says right on! Do it tomorrow! Know Christ and it will change how you speak and you will become an example to your brethren. It will change the patterns of your life so your brothers and sisters young and old will say I need to be cultivating what he's cultivating. I need to be cultivating what he's cultivating.

I need to be cultivating what she's cultivating. Know Christ and it will change how you love. Know Christ and it will change your spirit. Know Christ and it will grow and strengthen your faith. It will cause you to have victory over impurity so that you become an example to your brethren in purity.

You don't have to or need to wait around for anybody. You don't need anyone's permission to go for it spiritually. You can do that wherever God has planted you. It doesn't matter what home you're in, what work you do, what church you're in. Number three, how both of these things relate to singleness, how what you must be, what you must do relate to singleness.

Did you know that singleness is not a disadvantage in being what you should be and doing what you should do, but in some important ways, an advantage. Not a disadvantage, but an advantage. Paul makes that argument in 1 Corinthians 7, And Jeff Johnson is going to unfold that text for us next, but I'll just give you the punchline in preparation for that. It's in verse 45, that you may serve the Lord without distraction. Now is a unique period of time in your life that you may serve the Lord without distraction.

Marriage brings blessed distractions, but many distractions. You'll never be more free to go for it spiritually, to pursue knowing Christ more than you can now at the stage of life that you are in now. It is not a disadvantage, it is an advantage in many ways. If you have one ounce of yourself that whispers, the things, The important things are future. And or the important things require marriage.

And or the important things require me to be older. They require age. Conquer that ounce of yourself. Banish that whisper. The important things are not future.

The important things do not require marriage. The important things do not require you to be older. No, the important things are now and they prepare you for the future, for marriage, for life when you're older. They're now. They make you ready for those things.

Friends, go be what you should be. Find the surpassing worth of Jesus Christ. Go do what you should do. Get out front. Cultivate conformity to the image of Jesus Christ in your life.

Be an example to your brothers and sisters. Don't lag behind. Don't use age, stage of life as excuses for lagging behind. There are no excuses to lag behind. Be what you should be, do what you should do, God will sort out the rest and you will love it.

Do you believe that? I believe that with all my heart. If I just go be what Scripture calls me to be and it's the best thing and to do the things that Scripture calls me to do, those are the best things. I'll love it. I'll be the great gainer from it.

So will you. Let's pray. God, your word is sweeter than honey and the honeycomb. We taste it and we find it to be so good and sweet. Thank you for your word.

We need it so much. Thank you for giving it. Thank you for your son, Jesus Christ. And I pray that we would know his surpassing worth. I do pray that you would give us a holy discontentment.

I don't want to be left out. I want to be given a holy discontentment with little. I feel ashamed for how little I've been content with. Stir me up God, stir us up. Pray in Jesus name, Amen.