Jason Dohm's sermon, 'Marriage by the Book,' delves into the biblical foundation of marriage, using Ephesians 5:22-33 as the primary text. Dohm outlines the roles of husbands and wives, emphasizing that marriage is a divine institution reflecting the relationship between Christ and the church. He discusses the impossibility of redefining marriage, underscoring its permanence and sacredness as designed by God. The sermon traces the origins of marriage from Genesis, highlighting the impact of sin and the curse on marital relationships. Dohm calls for a return to biblical principles in marriage, where husbands love their wives sacrificially, as Christ loves the church, and wives submit to their husbands as a reflection of the church's submission to Christ. The ultimate marriage is depicted as the union of Christ and the church, culminating in the final marriage supper of the Lamb in Revelation. The sermon concludes with an exhortation for married couples to reflect the gospel in their relationships and for singles to prepare for marriage by understanding these biblical roles.

Our sermon text is Ephesians 5 verses 22 through 33. Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is the head of the church, and he is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for her, that he might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that he might present her to himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.

So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself, for no one ever hated his own flesh but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. This is a great mystery but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself and let the wife see that she respects her husband. Let's pray. Oh Lord our God, I thank you for this time. I thank you that you are sanctifying us so that you can present us to yourself as a church, as a body with no blemish. Oh God, please continue to do that work in us.

Please continue to prepare us for that day that we sang about when we see your face. Oh Lord, God bless this time, bless this sermon. I pray that you would be with Jason as he brings your word. Give him strength, give him courage as he brings your word. And I pray God that you would bless him as he speaks the message you've given to him.

Lord God may this may you help our help us to open our eyes to see God to seek out areas in our lives and our marriages where we're not Being carrying out this this picture of the gospel. Oh God, please be glorified through this time in Jesus name. Amen Title of the sermon this morning is marriage by the book. We're in Week three of four in our by the book Series week one was personhood and manhood By the book. What does the Bible say it means to be human?

What does the Bible say it means to be a man? Week two was a womanhood by the book. What does the Bible say it means to be human? What does the Bible say it means to be a man? Week two was a womanhood by the book.

What does the Bible say it means to be a woman? This week is marriage by the book. Next week is forming marriages by the book. So I'm enjoying it. Like gender, masculinity, femininity, like manhood, like womanhood, marriage has been and continues to be under relentless attack.

Attempts have been made to redefine it. And I'm going to explain during the sermon why that's actually impossible. It is impossible to redefine marriage. And so there are times when it's good and right and necessary to go back to basics. Just start with the basic building blocks about what the Bible says about the most fundamental things.

Like being a human being, like being a man, like being a woman, like this fundamental human relationship of marriage and how to go about forming it. So, let's ask God to help us. God, I Thank you for marriage. So good, such a help. It's as true today as it ever was, that overwhelmingly it's not good for a man to be alone.

It's still so true, I feel it in my soul. So thank you for giving us this institution and closest of all human relationships to address this great need. And I pray that you would help us to understand it, that we would be content with what your word says. Maybe so in Jesus name, amen. So you can see there are three major headings on the outline if you have a handout.

The First is Genesis 1 and 2, the first marriage. So if you're taking notes by filling in blanks, first fills in the first blank of the first major heading. Genesis 1 and 2, the first marriage. We've been in Genesis 1 and 2 for the past three weeks. I didn't come here to belabor Genesis 1 and 2 and to say all the things that I've been saying for the past three weeks.

Let me just summarize Genesis 1 verses 26-28, which we recited again. This morning there are really four truths that I want to highlight out of there. One, humans are made by God. Why does that matter? If we're not made by God, we can just do whatever we want to do.

Everyone can do what's right in his own eyes and who cares? But if we're made by God, then God has the rights of a creator and we better pay attention to what he says because he is the God who made us. Two, humans are made in the image of God. We're special in that way. We are the special creation of God bearing the image of God and therefore giving dominion over the other creations of God as His image bearers.

Why does that matter? Why was that fundamental? That we're meant to reflect the good and great image of the Almighty God who made us. Three, that we were made male and female. These are not human constructs dreamed up in the mind of man.

God actually made us that way on purpose. It was His design. It was His intent. Why does that matter? Especially in the day and age in which we're living, even these most fundamental things are being contradicted.

And fourthly, Males and females, mankind, we've together been given a gigantic, glorious two-fold mission. It's gigantic. It involves the whole world. And it's glorious. World and it's glorious.

It's consistent with the great privilege of bearing the image of God. And it's a two-fold mission to fill the earth and to subdue it. And there will be no filling the earth without males and females. Males can't fill the earth by themselves. Females can't fill the earth by themselves.

Neither can males subdue the earth. They actually need help, neither can females subdue the earth. And so we're interdependent. We need each other for the gigantic, glorious two-fold mission that God has given males and females together. That brings us to Genesis chapter 2 verses 18 and 25.

They are really sort of a replaying of God creating man as male and female. Only in this replay In Genesis chapter 2 you get a lot more detail and you even get names. Adam and Eve and how the creation of Eve came about from Adam. This is all framed by the beginning of that section, Genesis chapter 2, 18, where God says, it is not good that man should be alone. I will make him a helper comparable to him.

So that's the creation of women as helpers who are comparable, highly capable, image-bearing helpers to men in order to engage this gigantic, glorious two-fold mission. So God puts Adam into a deep sleep and he takes a rib and he makes a woman who is named Eve. Paul commenting on this text in Genesis and 1 Corinthians 11 observes that woman is made from man, the rib making a woman, and for man as a helper comparable to him. And then in Genesis 2.24 we learn the ultimate expression of what this relationship can be, and that's marriage. Look at Genesis 2.24, if your finger is there.

We've been here over and over again, and we'll be there repeatedly today, because it's quoted over and over again in the New Testament, Genesis 2.24. Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. There's a man, there's a woman, they're both in different families. They leave their families to form a new independent family. They leave and cleave, And God actually says that they become one.

In God's eyes, this relationship is so close. This love relationship, Now I'm bringing in Ephesians chapter 5 and Paul's commentary on Genesis 2.24. This love relationship is so close that it is actually two becoming one. So this is the first marriage. Adam and Eve, one man, one woman, being made, brought together, and made one, and then set in the garden to tend and to keep it.

That was Genesis 2.15. Before we leave Genesis, we need to consider Genesis chapter 3. And the entry of sin into the world. And God's pronouncing a curse on Adam and Eve and all of their future descendants. I'm one of them, you're one of them.

We're one of the descendants of Adam and Eve. So the curse was not just on Adam and Eve, but it comes down through the generations to me. And it has devastating implications for marriage. When you're talking about marriage and you come to Genesis to establish that God created it, that it involves the two genders, the mission of it. You can't leave Genesis until you hit sin coming into the world.

And the curse that resulted from that sin and its consequences on marriage. Look at Genesis 3 verse 16. Genesis 3 16. This is part of God pronouncing the curse. To the woman he said, I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception.

In pain you shall bring forth children." So remember the gigantic glorious two-fold mission to fill the earth. Now that's going to come with pain. That's part of the curse. There is a curse on carrying out this mission. Pain in childbirth.

But now look what it says at the second half of Genesis 3.16. Your desire, woman, wife, your desire shall be for your husband and he shall rule over you. Now don't misunderstand this, you can say, oh that's so sweet, she desires her husband. Look at chapter 4 verse 7 to understand this. This is Cain who wants to murder his brother and God comes in and warns him before the murder happens, and this is what we see in chapter 4 verse 7, if you do well will you not be accepted?

And if you do not do well, sin lies at the door and its desire is for you. Same word. Same Hebrew word used. So it's not sweet in Genesis 3 in the curse that her desire will be for her husband. Her desire for her husband is like sin's desire for Cain as it crouches at the door.

It's to dominate and devour. Sin is sitting at Cain's door to dominate and devour him. That's certainly within the meaning range of that Hebrew word desire. So what it means in chapter 3 is exactly what it means in chapter 4. Woman, wife, your desire shall be for your husband to dominate your husband.

And he shall rule over you. How would you like that to be the descriptor of your marriage? He rules over you. It is the picture of dominating, heavy-handed authority. Heavy-handed authority.

And so what's being said in the curse in Genesis 3 16 is that there's now going to be competition for headship. A woman's going to say I see you have authority, thank you, I'll be taking that. And there's going to be heavy-handed authoritarianism from men. Women will be inclined to usurp, to steal the authority of their husband, and men will be inclined to be much too heavy handed and to be authoritarian in their use of authority as head in the home. An inclination towards these things comes in the human heart as a part of the curse.

There is what God intended, a love relationship of oneness, and then there is the twisting of it that came with sin coming into the world. There are incredible headwinds to oneness. Headwinds meaning there is a hurricane blowing against you making progress in a love relationship of oneness. As we're born with the twisted warped natures that we're born with because of what sin has done to us. So that's number one, the first marriage.

Adam and Eve, the intent of it was a love relationship of oneness. Then they sinned and brought all this corruption into it that will give women a certain inclination to steal the authority of their husbands, to usurp it, and men to be much too heavy-handed and authoritarian in the exercise of the headship that God has given them. Number two, Ephesians 5, the ultimate marriage. So Genesis 1 and 2 was the first marriage. Now major heading number 2 is Ephesians 5, the ultimate marriage.

If you're taking notes on the handout, ultimate fills in the blank. Please turn to Ephesians 5. It was read as our sermon text, but we are going to work through it again. But in working through it again, I want to begin at the end. I want to skip to the punch line and read the conclusion that Paul draws from the whole section, and then go back to the section.

So if you're in Ephesians 5, and you should be, please. Ephesians 5, let's start in verses 31 and 32, where Paul quotes Genesis 2.24. Ephesians 5.31.32. Paul says, For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ in the church.

Oh, he reveals the mystery. I'm not talking about Adam and Eve anymore. I'm actually talking about Christ and the church. I'm not talking about human marriage anymore. I'm talking about what God designed human marriage to reflect, approximate.

So you have to get that. It is helpful sometimes to start at the end and then look at the whole passage through that lens. Human marriage, one man, one woman for life, joined together as one, is created by God as a sacred reflection of the ultimate marriage, and the ultimate marriage is Christ and the church. So from now on as Christians when we think about marriage, when we consider marriage, we look beyond human marriage to the ultimate marriage that it was designed to reflect. So human husbands are to have their thinking about their roles in marriage calibrated to the image they are reflecting.

This is the ultimate rule of thumb. Rule of thumb doesn't tell you everything you need to know, but I love rules of thumb because it allows you to take a case and say, is this consistent? Is this conduct consistent with what marriage was designed to reflect Christ in the church? If it doesn't pass that test, then you're on the wrong track. And human wives are to have their thinking about their roles in marriage calibrated to the image they are reflecting.

This is the ultimate rule of thumb for a wife. As the church honors Christ, loves Christ, follows Christ, Appropriately, rightly, is my conduct reflecting that accurately or not? Now, let's back up. And let's actually back up all the way to verse 18. Look at verse 18.

Paul writes, and do not be drunk with wine in which is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit. So this admonition to be filled with the Spirit actually frames a long section which includes the husband and wife relationship. What does it look like to be filled with the Spirit in the husband and wife relationship? And the parent-child relationship? Now we're extending into the beginning of chapter 6.

What does it look like for the parent-child relationship to be Spirit-filled? And the bond servant and master relationship? What does that relationship look like when? The the parties are spirit-filled. What does it look like to be a spirit-filled bondservant, a spirit-filled master, a spirit-filled husband, a spirit-filled wife, a spirit-filled parent, a spirit-filled child?

So that is what the section is about, be filled with the Spirit. Not surprisingly, a Spirit-filled marriage looks like Christ in the church. That actually might be the big point. A spirit-filled marriage looks like Jesus Christ and His inner relationship with His blood-bought people. Let me re-read verses 22 through 22-30 with you following along.

Ephesians 5, 22-30. Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is the head of the church, and he is the Savior of the body. Therefore, Just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives.

Just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for her, That he might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word. That he might present her to himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle, or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself for no one ever hated his own flesh but nourishes and cherishes it just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His body, of His flesh, and of His bones." Now we can unpack the gospel drama.

Paul at the end says, marriage is a playing out of the gospel drama. Christ and the people that he buys with his blood, his church. And we can trace each spouse and the roles of each spouse and the disposition of each spouse through this section of scripture. The wife playing the part in the gospel drama of the church, Jesus' blood-bought people. We start at a high level that whatever we find in this text, said of a wife, the calling of a wife will be consistent with how the church ought to relate to Jesus Christ because that is what the wife is reflecting.

That is the part she's playing in the gospel drama. A wife is to submit to her own husband as to the Lord. Why? Because he's the Lord. No.

No, he's not the Lord. But there's someone beyond the husband to be honored, to be ultimately honored, and that is the Lord, Jesus Christ. So a part of a way in which a wife honors the Lord is to submit to her husband. Part of the way she submits to the Lord is in her submission to her husband. Paul says it a little different way when he speaks on the same topic in Colossians 3 18 listen to Colossians 3 18 wives submit to your own husbands as is fitting in the Lord.

If you just sort of rearrange that, you get this. Wives, If you're in the Lord, there's something that's fitting for you as a wife, as for you to submit to your husband. If you're in the Lord, if you call Him Lord, if you have given yourself to submission to your Lord, part of that submission, Something that's fitting in your relationship to your Lord is submitting to your own husband. This is grounded in Jesus' headship over the church. Look again at verses 23 and 24.

For the husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is the head of the church, and he is the savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything." So you're seeing sweeping authority given to husbands. Why? Because Jesus has sweeping authority over His church. Let's at least agree that that's not controversial at all.

Jesus blotted us with His blood. We're His. It's right for Him to have sweeping authority over us. And He has the right to command His daughters. Jesus Christ has the right to command His daughters, and he commands his daughters to submit to their own husbands because it is a gospel drama and she has a part to play in her gospel drama.

It's grounded in Jesus' headship over the church. So why is a wife to submit to her husband? Because she's not as smart as he is. No, she might be a lot smarter than he is. That's possible.

That happens. Don't ask for Janet in my college transcripts. They're sealed. Because she's not as educated as he is, no. She might be more educated than he is.

Because she's not as gifted as he is, no. She might be more gifted because She's not as capable as he is. No, she might be more capable. It is because Christ is the head of his church. Period.

Amen. That is the end of the rationale, according to scripture. The husband is the head in the home only because Jesus is the undisputed head of his church and marriage approximates that relationship. And a wife is to respect her husband. Look at the very end of the text, verse 33, let the wife see that she respects her husband.

So don't miss this. In the curse, a wife has a natural inclination to compete for headship. That inclination is now woven into her heart to compete for a headship in the home because sin has come into the world and warped us, disfigured us. In the words of Genesis 3, Her desire shall be for her husband in the same way that sin was lying at Cain's door desiring him." Wow, what a desire. But in the Lord, get this, in the Lord that natural, meaning proceeding out of our warped nature now that sins here, that natural sinful inclination is overthrown.

It's a restoration from the curse. When Christian marriage functions properly and a wife offers submission to her husband because Jesus is her Lord and part of her submission to her Lord is her submission to her husband, then the curse is being rolled back in that marriage. Praise God for that. She is rejecting this natural proceeding from a warped nature, sinful inclination to compete for headship in that home and to have a never ending tug of war about who's going to be in charge in that home. She's submitting to Christ and therefore submitting to her husband and the curse is held back.

It's held at bay. It's beautiful. The backdrop is not the human husband and his worthiness. You must disconnect the submission of a wife from the human worthiness of her husband or there will never be submission in the home It is not based on the human worthiness of her husband It is based on the divine worthiness of her Lord Jesus Christ. And in the gospel drama, the husband plays the part of Jesus Christ.

Let that sink in for a minute. Let that sink in for a minute. A husband is charged with playing the part of God and his everlasting, unwavering love towards his people. Start at a high level like we did with the wife. Whatever we find in this text will be consistent with how the Lord Jesus relates to His blood-bought people, the church.

I think what was said about the devastating impacts on marriage of sin coming into the world, pronounced in the curse in Genesis 3.16, are both on display in the hatred of male headship. One is, It's now woven into a woman's heart to resent it and to compete for it. But the other is, because men have a natural inclination now woven into their sinful natures to be heavy handed and authoritarian and not Christ like in every way in the marriage relationship with the woman that a woman shrinks back because of what she sees around her in marriage. So there's something in her that's warped and not good that says, I hate anyone having authority over me, but there's also this other thing where men are heavy handed and are wrong in their exercise of their authority that makes them shrink back from it because they see it's all wrong. All wrong.

Christ is the undisputed head of His church. It is His church. And so the husband, according to the proclamation of God, is the undisputed head of his home. We've said this for many years, going back to when we were part of Hope Baptist. Husbands, you might be a good head, you might be a bad head, you might be a knucklehead, but you're the head.

You can say, I don't want to be the head. You have the authority to your wife. It doesn't make you any less the head because you don't get to declare yourself head. Nor do you get to say, I'm not the head? These things are at the disposal of Almighty God and they will not be overturned by you just because you'd rather be passive.

You might be a good head, you might be a bad head, you might be a knucklehead, but you aren't the head. You cannot change that. So Christian families have a structure, headship and submission Because human marriage is a sacred reflection of the relationship between Christ who is the head of his people and the church. As the church, as God's people, we owe Christ our submission. And we don't expect the world to understand it, and we do expect the world to hate it.

But it is a shame and a disgrace when professing believers don't understand it and when professing believers hate it. That is a shame and a disgrace. So the husband has authority in Christian marriage but the authority of the husband in Christian marriage is characterized. In other words, what's it like? Well the text tells us what's it like.

We're not left to wonder and guess. It's described. It is like Jesus Christ's headship over his people and we have four Gospels and a bunch of epistles that tell us what Jesus Christ's headship over his people is like. It's characterized by love. It's headship bearing the marks of love coming out of love.

Look at the beginning of verse 25 again. Husbands love your wives just as Christ also loved the church. So man, no big deal, just love your wife like Christ loved the church. Oh, That is a big deal. It's the mission of your life.

It's the biggest, hardest mission of your life. You'll never be given a bigger one or a harder one to play the role of Jesus Christ in the gospel drama. So it's not Dome Inc. Dome Incorporated. We're forming a business.

Every business has got to have a boss. You get to be the boss and you get to be the employee. This is a love relationship. If you don't have more to your marriage than Johnson Incorporated, or Lundquist Incorporated, or Stearns Incorporated, or Orr Incorporated, or Hensley Incorporated, or Templeton Incorporated, God help you. You're speaking against the Gospel.

You're speaking against the gospel. And not just thin sentimental love, what the world calls love, but the real substantial love of 1 Corinthians 13. In my reading plan, I usually on Sunday mornings will get a little bit ahead and start reading into Monday's readings. It was 1 Corinthians 13 this morning. God works in that kind of way in our lives all the time.

I'm not even in the right week. I'm in a different week than the week that's assigned to this week. This morning, God had me in 1 Corinthians 13, just to put before my eyes, When you say love, Christ loves the church. A husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the church. What does that mean?

It's not thin sentimental love of the world. It is the real substantial love of 1 Corinthians 13 that suffers long and doesn't keep a record of wrongs. And it includes emotion. We don't want to strip the emotion out of love. It includes rich, deep emotion, but it doesn't stop at emotion.

It continues into these self-sacrificing elements that can never be stripped out of real biblical love. So it's characterized by love. It's characterized by self-sacrifice. Now let's read all of verse 25 together. Husbands love your wives just as Christ also loved and gave himself for her.

So, the love of Christ for his people isn't a theoretical love that we just talk about. It's a love that is on display in the laying down of His life for His people. You say, how do you know Jesus loves you? Well, the Bible tells me so. Well, what does the Bible say?

It says He shed His blood. If you doubt that Jesus loves you, look to the cross and see Him bleeding and dying for sinners like you, and you will be convinced. His love is on display. And a husband's love is to be on display too, in self-sacrificing ways. Looking out for the interests of the beloved, prioritizing the interests of the beloved.

Serving the beloved. Jesus says, Jesus, the Son of God, the Lord of Glory, says, I did not come to be served, but to serve and to give my life as a ransom for many. Hey, husbands, aren't you glad you get to be the boss? Oh, this is what it means. It is characterized by washing with the Word.

Look at verses 26 and 27. That He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the Word. That He might present her to Himself, a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. He undertakes her beautification by washing her with the Word of God. Making her beautiful by immersing her in the Word of God.

It actually says that's why He gave Himself that he might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing. He gave himself for her, end of verse 25, that he might wash her with the water of the word, make her beautiful with the word. It is characterized by nourishing and cherishing. Again, real, substantial, Bible love. Not just thin sentimentality.

Nourishing and cherishing. This is very interesting. Paul grounds this in self-interest on the basis of oneness. On the basis of oneness. So Paul actually appeals to a husband's self-interest to nourish and cherish his wife, do it for your own benefit pal, on the basis of oneness.

Look at this in verses 28-31. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies, He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh but nourishes and cherishes it just as the Lord does the church." So because God has brought you together in a love relationship with a woman and made you one, it is in your self interest. It is self nourishing to nourish your wife and self cherishing to cherish your wife because you're one. No one ever neglects their own body so why would you neglect her?

Here's a question issued by Jeff Pollard. To husbands. Husbands, are you relating to your wife in ways that make her sorry she's a woman? Now, think of marriage as the gospel drama. The husband assigned a role, the role of Jesus Christ.

A wife assigned the role, the role of his blood-bought people, the church. And they're to relate together in their human marriage in a way that accurately reflects that. Now think of a wife who because of the way her husband relates with her is, sorry, she has to play that role. Oh, why do I have to play that role? I would switch roles in a second.

Husbands, are you relating to your wife in ways that make her sorry she's a woman? In a healthy, godly, Christian marriage, the wife glories in being a woman. Glories in being a woman. The wife wouldn't trade her role for all the money in the world. Again, the backdrop for this kind of lavish care is not the human wife and her worthiness.

If human marriages, if human husbands wait around for their wives to deserve the kind of care that Christ gives to his people, she might never get cared for. So if they're holding each other to this standard, deserve it and I'll submit to you, deserve it and I'll care for you, You end up with what we see all around us. The man not measuring up so she never submits, and the woman not measuring up so he never gives her that lavish care that God says give her. Because she's proven herself worthy of it, she may or may not have. That's not the basis.

Before Moving on, let's consider some implications of human marriage as a reflection of Christ and the church. I'm going to give you three implications of this. First, it is impossible to redefine it. Riley and Chelsea. Riley and Chelsea.

Your son is no longer Liam, he's Bob. What if I said that to you? You would say so fast, mind your own business. That's our son. The naming rights are ours.

And you can call him Bob to the end of your days, but he's Liam. That's the equivalent of human beings redefining marriage. Redefine marriage? God created us, and God created marriage. How are you going to redefine marriage?

This is Psalm chapter 2 on display. The nations raging. The kings of the earth saying, let's throw off his chains. Marriage confined to one man, one woman for life, we're throwing off that chain. God laughs.

He scoffs. How humorous to Him that someone without the naming rights would try to rename. Turn to Malachi 2. Turn to Malachi chapter 2. It's the last book of the Old Testament.

It makes it easy to find. If I said Zephaniah, you would struggle. Malachi is easy. Malachi chapter 2, look at verse 11. This is God through the prophet pronouncing a condemnation on Judah.

Judah has dealt treacherously and an abomination has been committed in Israel and in Jerusalem. For Judah has profaned the Lord's holy institution which he loves. He has married the daughter of a foreign God." Here, marriage is pronounced to be God's holy institution which He loves. There's two parts of that. It's His holy institution.

What does holy mean? Set apart to himself for himself. Marriage is mine and I reserve it to myself for my own purposes." So you're not allowed to touch it. You're not allowed to redefine it. Why?

Because it's mine. Liam is a Nastasi. Marriage is God's. And he loves it. He loves it.

Alright, why does he love it? Why does he love it? Look back through the New Testament lens. He loves it because he loves his son and his people. He's bringing his son and his people and making them one and he loves it.

The creation that is to reflect that he loves. He sets that institution apart to himself and he won't let anyone have it. No one else can redefine it no matter how many times they say it. No matter who says it and how many times they say it, It is God's, it has always been God's, it always will be God's. It is untouchable.

It is beyond the touch of mankind. So the nations can rage, and the kings of the earth can say, we're throwing off the chains, God laughs. God here accuses some of His professing people of marrying outside the faith. How have they profaned God's holy institution, which He loves? Have they profaned marriage?

He has married the daughter of a foreign God. You married outside the faith. Paul in 2 Corinthians 6 says, do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. That's what they did. So they profaned what God designed to be a reflection of the gospel drama and they messed it up by marrying outside the faith.

And then look what he says in verse 12, May the Lord cut off from the tents of Jacob the man who does this, being awake and aware, yet who brings an offering to the Lord of Hosts. Stop bringing those offerings! Don't you dare worship me!" So you touch his holy institution that he loves at your own peril and the stakes are so high. That's first, it is impossible to redefine it. Second, It must be intended to be perfect.

It must be intended to be permanent. Did I say perfect? Permanent. If it's to reflect Christ and His eternal everlasting love for His blood-bought people, it can't be intended, designed to be anything other than permanent. Still in Malachi.

Look at Malachi 2. I'm just going to keep reading. Malachi 2, 13-16. And this is the second thing you do. You cover the altar of the Lord with tears, with weeping and crying.

So He does not regard the offering any more, nor receive it with goodwill from your hands. Yet you say, for what reason? Because the Lord has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you have dealt treacherously. Yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant. But did he not make them one, having a remnant of the Spirit?

And why one? He seeks godly offspring. Therefore take heed to your spirit, let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth. Look at verse 16. For the Lord God of Israel says that he hates divorce.

For it covers one's garments with violence, says the Lord of hosts. Therefore, take heed to your spirit that you do not deal treacherously. If it is true that marriage is his holy institution that he loves, it must be true that he hates divorce. He hates it. Because he designed that marriage that you're now breaking apart to be a reflection, an accurate reflection of Jesus' undying, unending love for his blood-bought people.

He sheds his blood for them and then he undertakes their beautification by washing them with the Word. In Matthew 19, the Pharisees ask Jesus about divorce. And Jesus quotes Genesis 2.24, Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother, and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. And then he says this, So then they are no longer two but one flesh, therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. They're not satisfied with the answer, so the Pharisees press Jesus about Deuteronomy 24, which authorizes divorce under certain circumstances, and Jesus says this, Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts permitted you to divorce your wives but from the beginning it was not so.

God didn't create marriage with divorce in mind. Wasn't that way from the beginning. He didn't intend that from the beginning. He didn't create it for that in the beginning. It's against his creation and intent and purpose for marriage.

You have hard hearts. And so, he regulates life in a sinful world with things that he never intended in the original creation. That's what it's saying. So James and I affirm that there is such a thing as biblical divorce and remarriage. But Jesus is so clear, God never meant for that.

God provides for that with extreme limitations of very narrow circumstances. God provides for that with extreme limitations and very narrow circumstances, but he never intended that. He never wanted that. It's number two. It must be intended to be permanent and it is.

Because it reflects Christ in the church. And that's permanent. That goes through eternity. Number three, third. For Christians to have a marriage which is out of step with Christ in the church is to tell lies about Jesus in the gospel.

For Christians to have a marriage, the inner relationships between the husband and the wife which are out of step with Christ in the church is to tell lies about Jesus in the gospel. How do you like that? It must be the implication. If marriage was created to be an accurate reflection of Jesus and the church when the relationships are an inaccurate, warped, distorted picture of Jesus and the church, you're telling lies about Jesus. You're telling lies about the gospel.

I don't think I'm going too far to say If your husband and wife relationship is radically out of step with Jesus and how he relates with his people, you're preaching a false gospel in your marriage. I get this. I have just a couple of things that you'll remember from this, and you let me pick. I pick this, okay? I'm picking what I'm getting ready to say.

You Remember this. A great Christian marriage is designed to make the Gospel lovely. A great Christian marriage is designed to make the Gospel lovely. To make the people who have the privilege of observing it want it. Want the Gospel.

And first and foremost to the people on the front row. Who's on the front row? I was on the front row of my mom and dad's marriage. In many ways it resembled Christ in the church. It made the Gospel lovely.

Your children are on the front row observing your marriage, probably for 20 years. Is it making the gospel lovely to them? God designed it to make the gospel lovely to them. And for your neighbors, and for your co-workers. But more for the people who are closer, who observe longer.

Three. Major point number three, Revelation 19, the final marriage. We have the first marriage, Adam and Eve. We have the ultimate marriage, Christ and the church, and how human marriage reflects that. Revelation 19, we have the final marriage.

Turn to Revelation 19. I can see the end of the sermon if that encourages you. I can see it. It's right there. Revelation 19, follow along as I read verses 6 through 9.

This is the Apostle John, the author of Revelation. He says, And I heard as it were the voice of a great multitude, As the sound of many waters, And as the sound of mighty thunderings, Saying, Alleluia! For the Lord God omnipotent reigns. Let us be glad and rejoice and give Him glory. For the marriage of the Lamb has come and His wife has made herself ready.

And to her it was granted to be arrayed in fine linen, clean and bright, for the fine linen is the righteous acts of the saints. Then he said to me, Write, Blessed are those who are called to the marriage supper of the Lamb. And He said to me, these are the true sayings of God. It is a true saying of God that you are blessed if you are called to the marriage supper of the Lamb. The day is coming when Jesus will return to claim His bride.

He's already bought her with His blood. He's washing her with His Word. He's beautifying her and making her ready. She doesn't look like much to us now, we're part of that. But She's loved by Him and He's coming to claim her.

This is the picture. In Matthew chapter 22, the Sadducees try to entrap Jesus with a theoretical case study of seven brothers. In Old Testament law, if a brother dies, then his brother is supposed to marry the widow to raise up offspring to his dead brother. Well now there are seven brothers and they kill off all seven in the theoretical case study and they throw that in Jesus' face then whose wife is she in the resurrection? The Sadducees don't even believe in the resurrection so this is not an honest question.

And Jesus teaches there's no human marriage in heaven. He says you don't understand the scriptures of the power of God. He teaches there's no human marriage in heaven. We have in heaven. We have to ask this, why?

Why? If marriage is such an important part of the plan of God, a sacred reflection, If it's the source of such good and heaven is the ultimate place of good why no human marriage And the answer is because it's fulfilled its purpose There is marriage in heaven. What marriage? The lamb and his bride. The Savior and his people.

Two made one, enjoying eternity together forever. Eternity together forever. You don't need human marriage as a source of good in heaven because the greatest good that it was just intended to be a little glimpse of has come. No wonder in Revelation 22.20, this is the very end of the Bible, when Jesus says, surely I am coming quickly. John immediately says, amen, even so, come Lord Jesus.

John, part of Jesus' blood-bought people, part of the bride, oh groom, come quickly. Come claim me now. All that thrills my soul is Jesus. He is more than life to me. And the fairest of 10, 000 is my blessed Lord to me.

That song comes right out of the Song of Solomon. The Song of Solomon will make you blush. But the truth is it's either directly about Jesus Christ and His passionate love for His people, or it's indirectly about Jesus Christ and His passionate love for His people. Because human marriage is just a sacred reflection of the ultimate marriage. So take your pick.

It's either direct or indirect, but it is about Jesus and how he's thrilled with his bride, and about his bride thrills at the sight of him. And if you lined up ten thousand, she would say, it's him, it's him, there's no one like him. Applications. Applications. Two, and they're fast.

Number one, married people. Preach the purest gospel possible with your marriage. Oh, preach the gospel with your marriage. Preach the purest one you can. I know the gospel is words.

And I'm not a lifestyle evangelism guy. But if our marriages are to play out the gospel drama in the world, in addition to our words about Jesus and what He does for His people, which we must always do when we preach the gospel, Your marriage relationship should preach the purest gospel that you possibly can. Don't warp and distort what you're saying about Jesus and his people in your relationships. Two, unmarried people. Let your preparations for marriage be centered on this.

This is what it means to get ready for marriage. Men, study Jesus. How He loves His people. How He talks to His people. How He treats His people.

How he cares for his people. And get ready to play your part in the gospel drama. Women, consider the church, Consider how she ought to follow the Lord Jesus Christ. Loving Him. Submitting to Him.

Honoring Him. Respecting Him. God, I pray that would be true of all of us, everybody in the room, everybody listening, is either married or unmarried. I pray for married people that As we seek to play out the gospel drama that we would be preaching a pure gospel. Not telling lies about Jesus and His people.

For the unmarried people who are here, I pray that you would give them grace to know how to make themselves ready to play out the gospel drama so that when they go to the altar, they're ready to start reflecting the ultimate marriage. And God, we say with John, Come quickly, come quickly. We're ready for you to claim us. If it was today, we'd be so happy. We pray in Jesus' name, amen.