In his sermon 'The Law of God (Part 9),' Pastor Grant Brown discusses the division of the Ten Commandments into two tables: duties towards God and duties towards man. He emphasizes the importance of the Fifth Commandment, which instructs honoring one's father and mother as a foundational element for societal stability and personal well-being. Brown argues that honoring parents extends beyond childhood and applies to all ages, emphasizing the necessity of intact family structures consisting of a father and a mother. He asserts that any deviation from this, such as same-sex parenting, contradicts God's design. The sermon also highlights the critical role of discipline in parenting, viewing it as an expression of love and a tool for guiding children towards righteousness. The pastor underscores the importance of the Sabbath in the spiritual education of children and advocates for the integration of children in worship services. He links the rejection of parental authority to broader societal issues, suggesting that a failure to honor parents leads to a breakdown in respecting other forms of authority. The sermon concludes with a call to parents to lead by example, ensuring that their actions reflect the teachings they wish to impart to their children.

Exodus chapter 20 beginning in verse 1. Then God spoke all these words, saying, I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery. You shall have no other gods before me. You shall not make for yourself an idol or any likeness of what is in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the water under the earth. You shall not worship them or serve them.

For I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children, on the third and the fourth generations of those who hate me, but showing loving kindness to thousands, to those who love me and keep my commandments. You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not leave him unpunished who takes his name in vain. Remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord your God. In it you shall not do any work, you or your son or your daughter, your male or your female servant or your cat or your soldier who stays with you.

For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth and the sea and all that is in them, and rested on the seventh day. Therefore the Lord bless the Sabbath day and make it holy. Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the Lord your God gives you. May God bless the reading and the preaching of his word. Amen.

You may be seated. The Second London Baptist Confession of 1689, Chapter 19, describes the law of God in this way, quote, the same law that was first written in the heart of man continued to be a perfect rule of righteousness after the fall, and was delivered by God upon Mount Sinai in Ten Commandments and written in two tables, the first four commandments containing our duty towards God, and the other six our duty to man. This law commonly called the moral law doth forever bind all." End quote. The law of God summarized in the Ten Commandments is divided into two tables. Commandments one through four, our duty towards God.

And flowing out of our duty towards God vertically, comes commandments five through ten, our duty towards man, our duty towards our neighbor. In this division of God's law, first duty towards God, then duty towards neighbor. This is precisely what Jesus described in Matthew chapter 22 when he was asked by the Pharisees, what's the greatest commandment? Well here is his response, Matthew 22 verse 37, and he said to him, you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the greatest and first commandment.

This is, that's the first table, our duty towards God, love for God. Jesus went on, the second greatest commandment Jesus said is like it. You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments, love for God, love for neighbor, depend the whole law and the problem. So we began with the first commandment, you must worship the triune God exclusively.

Commandment number two, you may not use graven images to worship him. Commandment number three, This one true God puts his mark on you as his worshippers. You bear his name, so don't bear his name in vain. Commandment number 4, as name bearers, his worshippers, remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy. That's the first table of the law, love for God.

And so when you get to commandment number five, as we are this morning, this is how love for God vertically comes out of your fingertips and overflows horizontally to your neighbor, into the world. And it starts with honoring your father and your mother. This is how Almighty God begins the second table of the law. Love for neighbor, the way that love for God expresses itself for love for neighbor begins in the home. Now children, that should make you sit up straight.

God says to you, if you love me vertically with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind and strength, then that love for me will come out horizontally first and foremost to whom I gave to you as parents, your father and your mother. And I'm not just talking to little children this morning, though I am very much talking to you little children. But I'm also speaking to teenagers and very much to adult children. This commandment to honor those whom God gave to you as a father and mother very much applies to everyone in this room. So children, this is for you.

And parents and grandparents, this should make you sit up straight. Because if your children are to honor you, if they are to obey you parents, then that by necessity implies that you have an incredibly weighty responsibility to train them up and discipline them in the Lord as they honor and obey you. They're going to obey you in one sense. If they're going to follow this commandment, which direction are they going? This is huge for you this morning.

So let's just make sure we understand what's going on here in the fifth commandment. Parents, God thinks that honoring fathers and mothers is such a big deal that in the very next chapter of Exodus, Exodus 21, verse 17, God says that anyone who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death and God says the exact same thing in Leviticus 20 verse 9 and in Deuteronomy chapter 21 you curse your parents you die Now that's the same punishment as blaspheming God's name. That's the same penalty for profaning the Sabbath. This is a big deal. So hear me, fathers.

Hear me, mothers. If you don't want to discipline your child parent, if you don't want to raise him up in the fear and admonition of the Lord, if you will not train your child to honor you and obey this commandment, then you ultimately want him dead. Children, young children and teenagers, adults, children of all ages. If you reject this starting commandment of the second table of God's law, If you think honoring your father and your mother is something for the birds, then you are a fool. Because the second half of verse 12 must also be understood in light of other texts in scripture that warn you against disobeying your parents.

And the promise to you is this, if you reject your parents' authority, if you dishonor your parents, if you live a life void of devotion to your parents, then it will not go well with you in the land that God has given to you. Your days will not be prolonged in the land which God gives to you. The only thing prolonged will be a life full of misery, regret, and the wages of your iniquity, death, save for the grace of God. Love for God, love for neighbor. I think it's interesting isn't it?

That God begins the second table of his law with love for fathers and mothers. Love for neighbors starts with honoring the authorities in your life, namely fathers and mothers. As J.I. Packer puts it, quote, none may claim to love their neighbor while they shrug off their parents, end quote. None may claim to love their neighbor while they shrug off their parents.

And so putting the two tables of the law together, I think we can say this. None may claim to love God their father apart from making it their aim to love and honor as the Lord gives opportunity their earthly father and mother. Honor your father and your mother that your days may be prolonged in the land which the Lord your God gives you." This is the fifth commandment. So let us first recognize that God describes precisely who are to be the parents of a child, honor your father and your mother. Before we get to the actual command itself, first we must understand the simple but profoundly important reality that God's design is for a child to grow up in a home with both a father and a mother.

Now, not for a minute am I suggesting this Lord's Day in this sermon that the death of a parent somehow means that a parent who's been widowed or a parent who's lost their spouse to abandonment, I'm not saying at all that a single parent in those kinds of situations are insane. So don't go there this morning. Not suggesting such a thing. Don't go there with the exceptions. What I am saying this morning, what God says clearly this morning, is that His design for a flourishing family, for a flourishing church, for a flourishing state, is intact families with a mother and a father both present.

We will not have a healthy church. We will definitely not have a healthy nation apart from the foundational building block of churches and state, the family, being intact. So God's design for a flourishing family church and state is intact families, trusting in the gospel, where a father and mother are both present and to willingly push against that, to willingly with intention pursue raising kids as a single parent, to willingly redefine What a family is apart from God's clear instruction here is sin. Plain and simple. And again, I'm not talking about widowhood.

I'm not talking about man or a woman who's lost their spouse to apostasy. Not even left alone as a single parent. I'm talking about intentionally redefining what a family is. God says father and mother together, intact. So, this notion that you can raise children with two daddies, two men, an abomination.

When two men get together and they say they're married, first off, it's not marriage. It's mirage. You don't get to redefine something that God has clearly defined himself. Marriage is between a biological man and a biological woman. It's crazy that we've got to say that.

So homosexual marriage isn't real. And two men getting together in a fake marriage are not, according to God, to be raising children. So America right now needs to stop offering adoptions to gay men. It's destroying children and it will destroy our land. And the exact same standard applies to women.

Two women who think they are married are not married. It's not real. Don't care what the state says. God is Lord over the state. Says it's not real.

It's an abomination, and they're not to be raising children God says so and if they do not repent Quote Jesus quote Jesus if they will not repent It will be better for them to have a millstone hung around their neck for them to be thrown into the sea Then for them to make those little children stumble, which is exactly the outcome and the only outcome that can happen when a couple abominates God's design. So you're destroying children and unless you repent there will be eternal damnation to pay father and mother father and mother not two fathers Not two mothers and the wonderful news is that the God who says this the God whom lesbian women and gay men have committed gross abominations against, that same God gave His Son Jesus so that anyone, anyone in sexual sin, Anyone engaged in these abominations might be forgiven and may be born again and may children of God if they repent and believe the gospel. Jesus Christ, the Son of God, was crucified, put in the tomb, rose up out of that tomb for the justification of sinners like you. He breaks the power of cancel sin he sets the prisoner free How do I know his blood to make the fathers clean his blood availed for me?

And it will avail for you But you must repent and believe in his name You must give up your sin and you must be born again. Honor your father and mother. So young people, young people, listen to me very clearly. As you desire to be married, and you should desire to be married, you are to marry a member of the opposite sex in the Lord. You must enter into this one flesh for life union with no consideration for divorce.

For your to be husband and wife, father and mother to your children, should God give them to you what God has put together, let no man put asunder. God requires your family to be intact and divorce is not an option apart from the excommunication of your spouse from this church and their abandonment or sexual sin against you divorce is not an option apart from the excommunication of your spouse from this church and their abandonment or sexual sin against you. God's law, including this fifth commandment, makes that plan. Father and mother. Honor your father and mother.

OK? That was just the first bit. Honor your father and mother, the command says. Honor your father and mother. That is the next part of this passage.

First, let's look at the definition of that word honor. That word honor, there at the start of verse 12, it is actually the word for heavy or weighty. It could actually also be translated glorious or glory. So that's very telling. The calling of a father, the calling of a mother is a weighty and glorious thing.

And obedience to your father and your mother, honoring your father and mother is weighty and a glorious thing. So did you hear that children? Children are you listening to me? Obedience, honoring your parents, is glory. Not just talking to little kids here, talking to teenagers.

Talking to older children, honoring your parents is glory. It's the kind of weight, it's the kind of glory that changes the world. So you want to change the world? Sure. You can go to the gym, you can lift those weights, you can bulk up.

That's heavy. But far more earth shattering, infinitely far more weighty, far more glorious in a way that lasts forever is the glory, the weight of honoring your parents. So you want to know why we have such a breakdown in our institutions? Why we have calls to defund police departments? Why it seems like our society isn't just working anymore, nothing's working.

It's because we don't like authorities in our lives. In our sin, We want to cast off all authority. We cast off God's authority and we cast off every other authority that He's delegated to us here on this earth, starting with the home. Second table starts with the home. Where do we start casting off authority first?

In the home. Beginning with the authority in the home honoring, obeying your father and your mother. We cast it off. Authority is under attack in our land right now. We want to cast it off, which is why patriarchy suddenly is even a bad word in the church.

It was just ridiculous that patriarchy would be a bad word because it's in the Bible. This is crazy. We reject the fifth commandment. We reject the authority of parents. So why are we surprised that the rest of the commandments towards our neighbors are neglected as well in our society?

Of course they will be. You neglect the fifth commandment, why would you obey 678-910? Why wouldn't it be a problem to murder babies in the womb? We don't care about parents anyway. We don't care about children.

Everything. Everything. Our authority and our land is under attack. Our institutions are breaking down, society is breaking down, our land doesn't seem to be being blessed. Why?

Because authority is under attack. And that attack starts in the home. A rejection of the fifth commandment. A rejection of something glorious, honor your father and mother, glorious. We reject the glory for something cheap.

So children, lay down cheap rebellion and pick up the glory and the crown that is yours in honoring your father and your mother. And when you do that, you're saving the world. That's Proverbs 17, 6. Lay down the chief rebellion, pick up the glory and crown that is yours in honoring your father and your mother, and save the world. In Christ.

That ought to stick with you children. So the text says honor your father and mother and that honor is a glorious and heavy and weighty thing. So to quote Pastor Toby Sumter then, quote, this means that the opinions, wisdom, experiences, and convictions of parents are to weigh heavily on their children. Let me say that again. Parents, your opinions, your wisdom, experiences and convictions parents are to weigh heavily upon your children.

Which means parents, implicit in this command, is the command first for you to train your children up and discipline them in the Lord. Parents, this command actually starts with you. If your children are to honor you, if your children are to obey you as Ephesians 6 says, they are to obey you, they are to honor you, then that by necessity implies that you have an incredibly weighty and glorious and heavy responsibility to train them up and discipline them in the Lord. To provide them with the shepherding that they are to obey. If they're called to obey you, you need to shepherd them in that obedience.

If they're called to honor you, you need to shepherd them in that honoring. So here are three ways in which you, fathers and mothers, obey the fifth commandment. Training and instruction, discipline, and example. Training and instruction, discipline, and example. And fathers, it starts and ends with you.

Fathers, it starts and ends with you. As heads of households, as the authority in your home, train your child, discipline your child, and be an example for your child, and lead your wife in doing the same. And if your children will respect and honor and obey you, but not your wife, they are not respecting and honoring and obeying you. Honor your father and your mother. Disobedience to mommy is disobedience to daddy.

You got that? It's your responsibility. So first, training and instruction. Proverbs chapter 4, verses 3 and 4. When I was a son to my father, tender and the only son in the sight of my father, then he taught me.

He taught me and said to me, let your heart hold fast my words, keep my commandments and live. Proverbs 22 verse 6, train up a child in the way he should go. Even when he is old, he will not depart from it. So how's that done? How's that done?

Train your child, instruct your child in the Lord so that he won't depart from it. Catechism, family worship, praying with your child, talking with your child, singing with your child, that's huge. Reading with your child, memorizing scripture with your child, spending time intentionally with your children, leading them to have what's in here coming out right here. Teaching them the law of God. Teach your children the law of God.

And the gospel of Jesus Christ that that law leads them to, the gospel is the fulfillment of the law, then you teach them not just the law and gospel, you teach them how the gospel leads them back to the law. Here's how to live. Teach them. Do all that. Catechize, read them the Bible, teach them the scriptures, sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs.

Teach them, train them. All of that is to be done regularly every day throughout the day. Deuteronomy 6 verses 7 through 9. You shall teach these commandments diligently to your sons, and you shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, they shall be as frontals on your forehead, you shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gaze." That's pretty much everywhere you go.

Everything you do, saturated with, I got a limited amount of time with you young man, I got a limited amount of time with you young lady, and I love you too much to waste a single minute of. Alistair Begg, Uncle Allen, he puts it this way. Quote, the picture is not one of formal instruction alone, though formal instruction is absolutely critical. But the picture is not one of formal instruction alone, but the kind of learning that takes place as the family travels, lies down for the night, and rises to the opportunities and demands of a new day. In this way, a child begins to develop a biblical worldview without even realizing it.

This is the way that he should go. And you teach him how to walk in it." End quote. So teach and instruct your children to the Lord. Instruct your household every day. Got that?

But, do not forget the glorious gift of the Sabbath. Do not forget the commandment that comes right before this second table of the law begins. Remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy. Remember the Christian Sabbath. Remember the Lord's Day.

Worship with your children on the Lord's Day. So there was one day in seven, Sunday, wherein your children gathered with you to hear this word preached by one of their pastors. Think about that. There's one day in seven that you with your household fathers ascend the holy hill of the Lord and you feast on his word, and you feast on his body, you feast on his blood with his people. Worship weekly with your wife, with your children in the assembly.

We are a family integrated church, which means children are welcome. In fact, children are more than just welcome. We exhort them to worship with us. We want them in here. Why?

Because children are to worship with their households. Why? Because fathers are given the task of training and instructing their children in the fear and admonition of the Lord. And the Lord's Day is the peak day each and every week where that training and instruction happens. Together as a family.

And it's easy to prove this in the Bible. It's easy to prove that this is what God wants from you parents. It's very easy. You go, I don't know if he really wants my daughter. I don't really want my son in the gathering.

Can't you just kind of take a little bit of time off and let me get fed? It's not God's decision. It's not God's point of view. Just think about the book of Ephesians. Just think about the book of Ephesians.

Paul writes his letter to the Ephesian church, and what does he expect that letter to be done? Like, what's going to happen to that letter when the Ephesian church gets that letter? They're going to Read it. And to what? The whole assembly.

This is the sermon for the day. We're going to read this letter. Almighty scripture for the first time. You can imagine. Getting Ephesians for the first time.

I wonder what Paul is going to say. The entire church assembled together on the Lord's Day for worship was to read that letter. And as he writes this letter to be read to the entire congregation on Sunday, who does he particularly address at the end of his letter? Ephesians chapter 6, the first word, children. That's how the last chapter of Ephesians begins.

Children, children, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right. Honor your father and your mother, which is the first commandment with a promise, so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." Paul addresses children. Why? Because he expects them to be in the gathering.

Because the gospel message is for the children of believers. Because the law of God is for his children and their children. Because the promises are for you and your household. Because we are commanded by Jesus to let the little children come. So do it.

With joy. We don't neglect the Christian Sabbath as we seek to train and instruct our children. It's huge. Don't just zero in on the Fifth Commandment and forget the Fourth. Instruct and train your child.

The fathers and mothers' training and instruction will be of little to no avail if it is also not accompanied by Discipline. The kind of discipline that Solomon speaks of in Proverbs 13 verse 24, quote, He who withholds his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him diligently. He who withholds his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him diligently. This is the second way that parents obey the fifth commandment. They discipline their children in the fear of the Lord.

If your children are to obey the fifth commandment, and they are, you are tasked, mother and father, father starts with you, you are tasked with shepherding them to obey it. And this will call for discipline. This will call for discipline. The only human being that didn't need a spanking was Jesus a Discipline then that is called for here is diligent and motivated by love. Love for God and love for neighbor.

Love for God and love for your children. If you're going to love your neighbor, start with your children, parents. They're your neighbor. First and foremost, the two tables of the law. Once again, we're confronted with the truth concerning how this fifth commandment is the foundation of the second table of the law you cannot say you love your neighbor if you will not first love your children So love them enough to discipline them.

Love them enough to discipline them. You must discipline your child. You must spank your child. You must hold your child accountable. You must apply the law to your children and let them know that you love them too much for their evil behaviors to go unchecked.

From the moment a child knows what is right and does not do it, he or she must be checked, stopped, dead in their tracks, or he will surely perish." I'm not making any of that up, that's right in the Bible. Proverbs 22, 15. Foolishness is bound up in the heart of the child, but the rod of discipline will remove it far from him. Foolishness is bound up in the heart of the child, but the rod of discipline will remove it far from him. Foolishness is bound up in the heart of the child, but the wrong discipline will remove it far from him.

Foolishness is bound up in the heart of your child. It was foolishness in the young man who blasphemed the name of God, who was put to death, in Leviticus chapter 24. It was foolishness in the heart of the child manifest in the young man, in the young child, I think he was older, still a child, in the young man who profaned the Sabbath and was handed over to be stoned in Numbers Chapter 15. That was foolishness. Parents, by the grace of God, in the power of the Gospel, you must drive that foolishness away with the rod.

You must. So fathers and mothers, love your sons and daughters enough to discipline them is that not what God your father has done he still does for you Christian he disciplines you because you're his he disciplines you because he loves you do not forget the truth of Hebrews chapter 12. In fact, let's just go there. Hebrews chapter 12, in your Bibles. Hebrews 12, beginning in verse five.

Don't forget this truth, as you consider the discipline of your children, do not consider his discipline of you, his child. Hebrews chapter 12 beginning in verse 5. And you have forgotten the exhortation which has addressed you as sons. My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor faint when you are reproved by him. For those whom the Lord loves, he disciplines.

And he scourges every son whom he receives. Verse 7. It is for discipline that you endure. God deals with you as with sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline?

But if you are without discipline, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them. Shall we not much rather be subject to the Father of Spirits and live? For they disciplined us for a short time, as seemed best to them. But he disciplines us for our good, so that we may share his holiness.

All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful. Yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards, it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness. You put all that together. If you will not spank your child, if you're not willing to drive foolishness far from your child in love, then the Bible says you hate your little boy. You hate your little girl.

Why? Because you will not give them the gift of having their foolishness driven far from them. Because you will not give them the gift of knowing good and righteous boundaries. Because you will not give them the gift of knowing good and righteous boundaries Because you will not give them the gift to know the way that God made the world which is he made the world with authority Consequences for rejecting those authorities he made the world with authorities in it He made a world where there are consequences when you reject the God-given authorities in His world. And when you don't discipline your children, you do not give them the gift that they will know the way God made His world.

Don't do that. I saw it not very long ago. I can't remember his age. He was a young man. I'm thinking this is like 12 or 13.

I can't remember the exact age. He was brandishing something in his hand. It's a story. He was walking down the road, brandishing something, threatening in his hands. And so I think there was calls from neighbors, he's walking down this really busy street, maybe people on the road called in.

Police come, and there's a number of police officers surrounding this young man. You think it might be a gun. And so they approach him and they yell at him. Lay down on the ground. Lay down on the ground.

This child did not honor authority. This child did not respect authority. This child did not obey authority. Perhaps he'd never been made to. And so foolishness lived in his heart.

And he didn't do the thing the police asked him to do. Instead, he did the opposite. And the little boy was shot and killed. And people were mad at the police officers. And I agree, sure, police officers can be sinful.

They can be unrighteous, but not in this instance. Don't be mad at the police officers. Where are the people mad at the parents who hated their child? Discipline your child. Spank your child when he rejects your authority so that he will live long in the land that God has given to him.

Give your son, give your daughter, the gift of knowing the way that God has made his world, a world with authorities in it, and a world with consequences for rejecting those authorities. And beloved, if you will not discipline your child, you're not going to give them the security that loving discipline provides. You understand that? You will rob them of the joy of knowing my father and my mother really love me. I belong to them.

Don't rob your children of that kind of security that's exactly what God just told you in Hebrews chapter 12 one of the ways that you know that you belong to God the Father one of the ways in which you know that God is your father Christian through the finished work of His Son is what? You know you belong to Him because He disciplines you. He convicts you of your sin. He deals with your sin. He doesn't leave you in your sin.

He disciplines you out of it. He drives the foolishness far away. And it's really painful. Really hurts. But in the end, you praise God, don't you, for it?

Why would you praise God for something that hurt like that? Why would you get done with the discipline session and go, thank the Lord? What would be in you that you would say such a thing? Thank you God for the pain! Because you know in that discipline, that's your Heavenly Father saying, you're my child, redeemed by the blood of my son.

My child, my children, do not go down that path that you are going down. My children, do not go down that path that leads to destruction. I will not let you go that way. I love you. You're mine.

The discipline of the Lord provides such security to the believer that you belong to God. I have dear saints come into my office and they are broken over their sin they are saying how could I go to such a level of sin how could I truly be saved to go here and they are so convicted and they're trusting Christ to say but how can I go here the pain the misery I hate it what is that I would argue that is the rod of God disciplining the child to say, you're mine, you can't go there anymore, come back to my son? But if there is no conviction, if there is no discipline from God the iniquity in your life has never dealt with through the loving discipline of God what does that communicate to you it communicates that you are not a son It communicates that you are not a son. It communicates that you are not a daughter of the Father in heaven. Because if you were a child of God, He'd not spare the rod.

He'd not withhold loving discipline from you. He'd bring you back. Saints hear me. The Lord God Almighty loves His own. He loves them enough to discipline, so parents, so should you.

And I'm speaking to the choir because you do a good job. Press on in that, brothers and sisters. Press on. Do not grow weary of doing such good. You're changing the world.

Ephesians 5, verses 1 and 2. Be imitators of God as His beloved children and walk in love. So as imitators of God, parents, imitate him in discipline because you love. Love demands discipline. That's actually exactly what's written on the back of our paddle at home.

In the providence of God that paddle was sitting on top of my Bible this morning. I thought about bringing it and showing you, I thought that'd be a little weird. But on the back of it it says love demands it. So when I pick up that paddle to spank my daughter, which I never get excited about, it's not something you want to do. You want to pick up that paddle to spank my daughter, to drive the foolishness bound up in her heart far from her.

I'm not to be angry. I'm not to have sin in my heart. If it's there, I need to deal with that sin first before even daring to deal with the sin in my daughter. I'm not to be angry, I'm going to love my child, And if I spare that rod in that moment, because they are in sin, I don't love her. I will communicate that I hate her if I don't spank her.

And so I discipline her diligently in love. So again, remember Proverbs 13, verse 24, he who withholds his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him diligently." And again, Ephesians 6-4, fathers do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. We were at the park last summer in Erlund. So we call it the fish park because it has like a fish slide. It's the one by the school.

There's two parks, two playgrounds in Erlund. So we're at the one next to the high school. And we're playing. It's during the summer. There's no school.

And I'm with my two older girls, and there was another boy at the park, and it appeared like it was his father and grandfather and his mother and grandmother. Big kind of group of adults. Definitely his father was there because he called him daddy. I think it was the grandfather that was next to him. So they told this young boy, time to go.

Time to go. The boy spun on his heels, ran to the grandfather, and full force jacked him in the face. My girls, and I'm watching this going, full-faced nose, right in front of the father too. My girls are watching this unfold with me and I'm watching and there's not a single word from the dad. And instead we've got mom reasoning with this little boy.

He's gotta be five. And here's exactly what it said. I know you wanna stay, but we really need to go. Meanwhile, the boy is still trying to get a few in. The boy's kindergarten easy.

So now I'm a little embarrassed about this. Maybe not. I'm not embarrassed, I shouldn't say that. But I was so caught up in the scene, it was just like a guttural response. My girls heard it.

I don't know if they heard it. I mean, it was loud, so I think they heard it and they just chose to ignore it. But I just, it just came out, I spanked that boy. It came out of my mouth. I yelled it.

That's a true story, verbatim. Now here's what I thought was the precious moment in that was as the little boy is drug away screaming, my oldest looked at me and this is what she said, and I wrote it, I tried to write it exactly as I remember it. She said very seriously to me, she goes, that daddy doesn't love his little boy very much to let him act so crazy like that. That daddy doesn't love his little boy very much to let him act so crazy like that. That daddy doesn't love his little boy very much, let him act so crazy like that.

I'm not making this up, but then she said, and this is very precious to me, particularly because we are in a season of, Las Vegas. You love me, daddy, so you wouldn't let me act that way. That's precious. You love me, you wouldn't let me get away with that. I told her, that's right, sweetheart.

The brown girls get disciplined, not because they're trying to become daddy's daughters. No, they get disciplined because they are daddy's daughters. And their daddy is so committed to their earthly and eternal good that he will not spare the rod. Their daddy determined to teach them how to honor their father and mother, because God commands it. And I want them to live long in the land that their God has given them.

So parents, you need to heed the call of Almighty God. Discipline those whom you love. Never in anger. If you discipline in anger, then you need to lead the way of confession of your sin first. Confession that's clear, without qualification to your spouse and child.

If you use discipline and anger, that means to be confessed publicly to your children. It's not the discipline that produces righteousness. In fact, it's the discipline that's forbidden in Ephesians 6.4. The kind of discipline that stirs up wrath. Don't do that.

It's not the way God your father disciplines you. All of his wrath was poured out on his son. When he disciplines you, he's not penalizing you. He disciplines you because he loves you. So if you have a child in the Lord's Day gathering, who is not heeding your instruction, let's say in just two seconds from now, your child disregards your authority, they're not obeying you.

If they know what it means to sit quietly and listen, and they're going to test your authority right here in this gathering, then deal with them. Take your son, take your daughter out of the gathering, go to one of these back rooms and see to their correction. Correct the behavior through spanking. Do it in gospel power, then bring them back to try again and repeat as many times as necessary. And we will all smile at you for it.

Good job, Dad. Way to go. You love your son. You love your daughter. Do it as many times as necessary so that in God's perfect timing, the foolishness bound up in the heart of your child will be driven away as they learn to honor you in your home and in this church and in the world.

John Calvin famously said this, those who abuse or stubbornly violate parental authority are monsters, not men. Those who abusively or stubbornly violate parental authority are monsters, not men. So that applies to both parents who abuse their authority and for children who will not submit themselves to the authority of their parents. Monsters not men. Fathers do not raise monsters.

And this leads us to the final and third way that parents are to obey this command by example. By example we'll get the children next Thursday in case you're wondering whoa it's 45 minutes still on parents that's coming next time your example really matters You cannot ask your child to do something that you won't do yourself. You got that? And you need to do parents for your parents what you want your children to do for you when you're older. I'm going to say that again.

You cannot ask your child to do something that you won't do yourself and you need to do for your parents what you want your children to do for you. So first, by your example, you demonstrate the behavior and the heart that you long to see in them. So if you're sick and tired of your children whining, right, and you say, okay, pastor, I'm going to get that rod out. I'm going to drive that foolishness far from them. Check yourself.

Have you been whining, mama? Have you been whining, daddy? Have you been complaining? Have you been letting foolish talk come out of your mouth? Now you're sick and tired of them doing the same thing.

You stop it. Better confess that first. Better deal with your own sin first. Better get the huge tree trunk out of your own eye before you start working on the splinter in your children's. You cannot, you need to hear this, you cannot discipline your children for sin that you yourself are totally fine with in your own life.

That's called hypocrisy. And that is expressly forbidden by God throughout the Old Testament, expressly forbidden by Jesus who is God, throughout the Gospels, and expressly forbidden by Paul, inspired by God in Ephesians 6. When you discipline in a way like that, that stirs up wrath, That behavior is sinful. And it might be the case that all your children are doing is watching you. I want to be like daddy.

I bear his name. Well why wouldn't they whine when you whine? Why wouldn't they complain when you complain? Why wouldn't they treat you the way you treat your parents? So by your example, fathers, I've been saying this a lot, but I really mean it.

Lead the way in confession and repentance. Confess to your children, confess to your wife, mothers do likewise, be free and then love. So I believe I'm a very imperfect father, very imperfect. I have confessed my sin all the time to my wife and my children. All the time.

But I learned that from my father. My father led the way in confessing sin. I have memories of looking at my dad with tears in his eyes, having been angry, particularly with my younger brother, and him coming to me and coming to my mother and coming to my brother and saying, that was evil. And walking me through the gospel, the gospel's for my dad, the gospel's for me, I need it. And having that example.

Lead the way, fathers, in the confession and repentance in your homes. And remember what Jesus said. Remember what Jesus said. Equal weights and measures, right? Unjust measures are an abomination to God.

By the standard that you use, it will be used against you. You remember that? Mark's gospel. By the standard you use, it will be used against you. So, how do you wish for your children to treat you when you are old?

So, how do you wish for your children to treat you when you are old? So how do you wish for your children to honor you when you are aged and they are now parents of their own? How do you want that to look? Well, how do you honor your aged parents? It's funny how we forget this.

It's very funny how we forget this. Parents, do you complain about your father and your mother? Do you disrespect? Do you fail to show honor to your father, mother, father-in-law, mother-in-law? You better believe if you do that.

When the tables are turned and the positions are flipped, this is precisely what your children will do to you. Dishonor and disrespect. Why? Because you showed them the way. You showed them that obedience to the fifth commandment, it doesn't really apply when you get older.

Don't do that. Fathers do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. So call your children to the same behavior that God has called you to, Christian. Say to your children, imitate Christ as you imitate me. Imitate all of Christ for all of life.

That's the call. That's parents. Children are next. We're gonna see more of that in the fifth commandment next Lord's Day, Lord willing. But for now let's pray.

Father in heaven, thank you for this your word. Thank you for all that is in it. Make us doers, not just hearers but doers. Oh and Lord fill us with love. Fill us with the glory of your gospel.

That Christ died to save sinners of whom I am the foremost, and the promises for me, and for my children, and for my spouse, the promises for me and my household. Oh, give us the grace to believe it. Give us the grace to live it out. For your glory in our home, for your glory in our church, and for your glory to the ends of the earth. In Jesus' name we pray.

Amen. Amen.